Til Now
by Zhivago3
Summary: Sam fell for Sookie; Sookie fell for Eric. Who will be there when the world Sookie finds herself in, crumbles? A/U Rated M for language and sexual content.
1. Prologue

**We all have Zee to thank (blame?) for this. She told me to continue this one-shot, and for some reason I will be. Something about this little idea wouldn't stop swirling around my head - I needed to purge (in a good way… I think?). The lovely Ms. Pixigiggles will be correcting my horrible comma placement and general lack of punctuation issues. Conflicted? You bet! I won't be sure that this was a good idea until I hear it from you. So if you like it, want more, please let me know.**

**Thanks!**

**-Zhiv**

**I don't own any of it, but dammit I really wish I did!**

**Prologue**

_**Sam POV**_

**June 2010**

"Where's Eric?"

"With a redhead."

"Shit, Sook." I shook my head and let it hang low, she didn't deserve this again.

"Don't say it okay? Just don't say it, Sam."

"Say what?"

"I told you so."

"I wasn't going to."

"You were thinking it though."

That always freaked me out. Sookie had some weird sixth sense that threw me for a loop every time. Even through the phone she somehow knew what I was thinking.

"Okay, maybe. I wouldn't have said it though."

Silence. What do you say to the woman you love, when the man_ she_ loves just cheated on her … again.

"Sookie, I…"

"Take me away, Sam? Please?"

Running away wouldn't solve anything, but … "Pack a bag, I'll get the tickets."

"Where are we going?"

"Texas."

"What about your bar?"

"Lafayette can handle it."

I had a beach house on the gulf coast of Texas. It was nothing fancy, but you could smell the ocean from every room and it was nice to have a place to escape to. Plus, Texas was home and there was nothing wrong with going home every now and then. I called the airline and was lucky enough to grab two tickets for a late flight. After quick call to Lafayette asking him to hold down the fort while I was gone, I jumped a cab and picked Sookie up.

She was waiting for me on the stoop of her townhouse. It was a ridiculously expensive place on the Upper West Side. Eric had bought it for them after his first indiscretion, promising her that this was the place they'd raise a family._ "Weren't schools amazing in the neighborhood?" he'd said. "And, look, it's across from Central Park; we can take the kids there anytime we want_."

It was an amazing place to live. It was also a bribe. That was two and a half years ago, and there weren't any kids running around their huge townhouse. It was another promise left by the curb.

She got in the cab. She looked so damn tired and thin, nothing like the vivacious curvy Sookie I knew. There was a time when she would have cried and pulled her hair, broken a few expensive vases, ripped some silk pillows. The following day they would have been replaced with even more glamorous versions, courtesy of Eric. But now, she was just a pale shell of herself. The fact that she was pale was maybe the worst bit of it all. Sookie never smoked, hated to drink, and never cursed, but she was a slave to the sun. It was July, she should have been the shade of caramel by now. Instead, she looked like a ghost.

She got into the car, scooted close to me, and rested her head on my shoulder.

"Thanks, Sam."

Almost six hours later and we were making our way down the dirt path to my place. Sookie had basically fallen asleep at every turn. I woke her up when we got to the airport, woke her yet again to walk on the plane, nudged her awake when we landed and now I was brushing the hair from her cheek yet again.

"We're here, Sook. Wake up, okay?"

She nodded sleepily. I got our bags from the trunk and helped Sookie to the master bedroom. It was roomier than the guest room, and it also opened up to the beach directly through sliding glass doors – there's nothing like being woken up by the sound of waves. Almost the second her head hit the pillow she was asleep … again.

I was unnerved. But I wasn't scared enough yet to call someone. Maybe she just needed the sleep - I'd never been in her shoes but I suspect that if I had, sleep would have been comforting too

The next morning, I woke up later than usual. Getting out of bed I opened the curtains to a perfectly sunny morning. The sliver of water I could see from the window was sparkling … the trees on the side of the house were swaying in the breeze. I went to the bathroom, jumped in the shower and got dressed. I walked around the house looking for Sookie and when I couldn't find her, I stepped outside. Ten-twenty in the morning and it was already getting hot.

Sookie was sitting on the beach. Her hair was down, grazing her shoulders and bare back. She was in a black bikini. Her pale, pale skin practically glowed in the light. She looked like a fairy or something. I walked over and stood beside her, and her arm instantly wrapped around my shins.

"It's glorious here, Sam."

"I like it," I replied, reaching down to smooth a strand of her hair back.

"Why haven't you ever taken me here before?"

How was I supposed to answer that? _Because you were always too wrapped up in some drama with your asshole husband?_ I opted for saying nothing.

"Sit with me?"

"Ya, sure."

We sat there, side-by-side for minutes, maybe hours, who knows? It was after July Fourth and being the middle of the week the only people we saw were the occasional runner or someone letting their dog run off the leash. I could have sat there for days next to her before I thought about moving.

"Sam?"

"Hmmm …."

"Are you still in love with me?"

You could have knocked me over with a feather, for a few reasons. First off, who could fall out of love with a woman like Sookie? Even Eric, for all his philandering and shitty behavior, still loved her. It had to be the only reason he hadn't left her, right? Second, and more importantly, the fact that she knew that I loved her at all was a shock to the system.

The only thing I could do was be honest. "Yes, Sookie. I still love you." _I always will_, I added to myself.

"Will you take me inside Sam?"

I was about to ask why when –

"I want to know what it's like to sleep with a man who really loves me. I don't know that I've ever had that pleasure."

"Sookie, Eric loves you."

"Maybe. He says he does of course. He thinks he shows me with every Cartier box and expense account. In the end though, it's someone else he fucks at night."

"I won't be your payback."

She looked at me, teary. "Sam Merlotte," she started, as serious as a heart attack. "You're the best man I know. I want to know what it's like, Sam. My whole life, I've been with men who've told me they loved me. But each of them hurt me somehow. How can that be love Sam? I've never …."

Tears were running down her cheeks. "You've never what?" I asked quietly.

"Make me a woman Sam. Can you really call yourself a woman if you've never made love with someone who loves you back?"

I didn't know the answer to her question. But I had so many of my own. Did this mean she loved me? Would she stay with Eric after? If she weren't in love with me, could she, would she, after I slept with her? Could I live with myself having had her like that, even if she rejected me? Did any of that really matter?

The bottom line was this: I loved her enough to do this, even if it broke me eventually.

We got up together and walked back to the house, through the glass door, and into the bedroom. We stood in front of each other, the bed grazing our knees. Suddenly, I was nervous. I had wanted this for so long that finally having it seemed … what? Unreal? Weird?

It became real the moment that Sookie finished untying her top. It fell to the floor silently. I followed it and raised my head to see her lovely breasts. Rosy tipped, round, ready for me to touch. She sat on the bed, scooted back, and good lord on high, she hooked her thumbs under the elastic of her bikini bottoms. I watched her bend her knees and push the fabric down, down, down until they were flicked away by her toes.

I couldn't help but think that she was too thin. My Sookie, the pre-Eric Sookie, was female perfection. Not bony and flat like so many models and bar tramps, but round and soft - womanly. Somehow, over the years, she had become something she wasn't. Flat and thin. Sure, she might look better now in the couture clothes that Eric bought for her, but it wasn't Sookie. It never would be. Despite all that; despite her protruding hip bones and ribs, despite the darker color she dyed her hair now —despite it all, she was still the woman I compared all others to, and no one had ever lived up to her.

She lifted her arms above her head and waited for me to take her in. Eventually, I threw my shirt on the floor and stepped out of my pants. She took me in as I had her, and when I let my boxers fly over my shoulder, she smiled. I had no idea how I compared to Eric physically - he was taller, blonder, and broader than me - but I'm a damn good looking man and I know it.

Sookie shifted on the bed, laying her entire body flat as I crawled over her. I settled myself between her knees and gently pushed her legs open. She wasn't bare. Her curls were a darker blonde than on her head, but her sex was rosy like her nipples, and much to my surprise, already glistening. I trailed a finger along her slit and moaned at the same time she did. Her hips lifted as I trailed my way back up the way I came.

"This might tickle," I warned her.

I hadn't shaved in a few days, but before she could ask what I meant, my head was between her legs. I could smell her arousal. When I felt her tense, I lifted my head only long enough to say, "Relax." Christ, had it been so long for her? Didn't that sex fiend of a husband ever touch her, Kiss her, lick her?

I lapped at her sex. She was salty and sweet. She panted gently as her hands made their way to the back of my head. I placed one hand on her abdomen, while the other found her hand and we clasped fingers. I relished every little gasp, twitch, and pant she gave me. Her gentle noises became more rushed and urgent. She was close and I desperately wanted to see what she looked like as she came. I lifted my head and pressed the pad of my thumb to her bundle of nerves, rubbing it. Her eyes were closed, her hair was slightly mussed, and her pretty pink buds were puckered tight. She gasped as her chest lifted off the bed. Her legs shook, but nothing else moved as she released her sweetness onto my hand.

When her body relaxed again, she looked at me. Her expression was something between happy and confused. Something was gnawing at me. I just, I had to know ….

"Sookie, how long has it been since you've been with Eric?"

She turned her head to the side, as if she were ashamed.

"New Year's Eve."

Son of a bitch. I could only imagine how many rubies, silk shirts and crystal vases he had purchased in the past seven months. But not touching his stunning wife? Even once? It never crossed his fucking mind. She squirmed, and I knew she was ready to run off the bed and hide. I couldn't let her do that. I was a fraction faster and pinned her arms to the bed.

I kissed her. I kissed her good and hard, the way she should have been kissed everyday of her life. She relaxed beneath me and let her tongue slide into my mouth. That was all it took for my semi to get hard. She must have felt it against her. Her hand wiggled from beneath mine and touched the shaft. My head reeled back. I needed inside of her in the worst way.

"Sookie …."

"Please, Sam. Now."

"Yes ma'am."

Pushing myself into her was something between pain and bliss. She was tight of course, but she was also silky smooth inside. When I was buried inside, her legs wrapped themselves around my hips. Warm. She was so damn warm. I didn't move and just relished the feeling of being inside her. Then, slowly, very slowly, I rocked into her.

I almost came right then and there. I felt like a fucking teenager.

_Pisco Sour. Three parts brandy, one part lemon juice, 1 tablespoon sugar. _

_White Russian. Two parks vodka, one part Kahlua, one part cream_

_Side car. One and a half parts bourbon, one part Cointreau…_

Somehow, I managed to get myself under control. I pushed in and out of her, marveling at how perfect she felt around me - around my dick, around my waist. Her eyes were closed as she inhaled with every push, exhaled with every pull. I wanted her closer. I pulled out, lay besides her, and urged her to her side. She seemed confused until we were spooning. When I slipped back into her, she sighed, moaned, then whispered, "Yes."

My arms snaked around her body. One hand found itself grasping a perfect breast, the other made its way down her body, finally resting at the apex of her legs. She wanted love? She wanted to know what it felt like? It was making sure that above all else, she was taken care of. I wanted her to come so many times that she begged me to stop. I wanted to feel her release. I wanted to feel her quiver around me.

As I pressed a finger to her clit, she gasped. We moved in unison, I circled her nerves, bringing her closer and closer to her release. Her breathy, sexy moans became more urgent and higher. She was going to come for me. Grabbing her breast tighter, and rubbing her faster, she eventually began to shake, go silent, then she cried out as I felt her go to pieces. Feeling her like that, knowing that I had done this to her, it was all I needed to find my own release. When she felt me stiffen and go over the edge, she let out a breath I hadn't even realized she'd been holding.

When I came back to my senses she was crying. I was terrified.

"Sookie, please darling. Please don't cry."

"It's okay," she got out between quiet sobs. "It's okay Sam."

I ran to the kitchen to get her some water. When I got back to the bedroom, she was standing by the glass door, naked, hair a mess. Her back dipped down to her heart-shaped ass. Her legs were crossed as she looked out at the beach.

"Water?"

She turned to me, wiped away a tear and smiled. Shit, I damn near fell over the corner of the bed. She was a glorious mess - so beautiful and broken. What was going on in her head? I desperately wanted to ask her every question that had come to my mind before, but the words wouldn't come out.

She walked to me, took the glass from my hand, and put it on the bedside table. She hugged me, her breasts pressed into my chest, her head resting on my shoulder.

"That's what it's like to be made love to, isn't it?"

Christ on crutches. "Yes," I answered because it was the only word I could say just then.

"Then I've never been made love to 'til now."

**A/N:**

I know some of you might have a hard time dealing with my portrayal of Eric… I did too. Just to prove that I love me some Eric, you can read my other SVM story "Then As Now." That being said, this is about Sam and Sookie – and this is where the idea led me. That being said, a huge thanks to Pixie who made this so much smoother. I'll be looking forward to rev's next chapter.


	2. Ch 1, June 1999

**Few references here:**

_**The Park**_** is a real place in Chelsea. It's really lovely and fun. The site is theparknyc(dot)com. Check it out. **

**A **_**Louisiana Lullaby**_** is a drink from… you got it! Louisiana. It's Dubonnet Rouge, Grand Marnier, and Dark Rum.**

**By the way, at this point I think this story will be all Sam POV. That being said, I'm not 100% sure about that, so I'll keep putting his name there in case I switch it up.**

**Pixie is my punctuation goddess. **

**Other than that: None of it's mine except a twisted fantasy consisting of Pam slapping Sam's ass. **

**June, 1999**

_**Sam POV**_

_(11 years earlier)_

I met Sookie in the summer of '99.

It was June and I was at bat. Bahaar had a curve ball that could knock you off your ass. We were playing against the Agra team that day - a popular Pakistani restaurant on the East side. It was the playoffs; the winner would be up against Izumi, the Japanese place in Soho that had claimed the championship three years in a row. I wanted that title real bad.

Bahaar let the ball fly, a perfect curve. I swung my bat, hearing a satisfying crack! I didn't even think and started running. That was my thing, I ran. I was faster than damn near anyone in the league and I had Bill to thank for that. That Dalmatian could run for hours …. As I passed first I could see the outfielders scrambling. I dashed for second, rounded third, and I then I saw her sitting on the bleachers. Oh man, that first glimpse. Miracle I kept breathing, let alone running.

I was moving fast, but I could see blonde, curves, and killer legs. I had no idea what was happening with the game at that point. All I wanted to do was slide home and find the blonde again. I was safe … at least in the game. I couldn't focus on much else except the blonde though. She sat there enjoying the game alone. She knew what was going on too! She'd whoop and holler at the right times and yell at the ump when he made a bad call. Of course that wasn't really poor Mr. Jackson's fault - he was at least 10 years too old to be ump anymore. No one had the heart to tell him though.

Bill barked and ran in circles when we won; he was our unofficial mascot. Mostly, I think he just wanted to run and catch the balls with us, but even I had to admit he looked cute in the blue Viking T-shirt's that Pam ordered for the team. I let Bill off the leash to jump and cheer with the rest of the team, knowing full well that none of my guys would let him get away - they all loved that dog like it was their own.

I turned toward the bleachers to see the blonde walking away. Aww hell no that wasn't happening! Sweaty and dusty, I ran in her direction. I couldn't let her go without trying to get a name and number. Hopefully she was single. I started jogging toward her when out of the corner of my eye, something black, white, and blue ran past me. In slow motion, I saw Bill, tongue hanging out of the side of his mouth like a damn fool, run right into the back of the blonde's legs. The blonde, completely caught off guard, buckled and started falling forward. I don't know how I made it time to break her fall, but somehow I grabbed her from behind, pressed her to me, and spun us so that she fell on me, instead of hitting the concrete path.

"Ooof!" I cried out as we slammed into the ground.

"Oh …." but the rest was cut off by Bill, who was running around us in manic circles, jumping and barking like it was some damn game. Crazy ass dog.

"BILL!" I shouted as loudly as I could, "TERRY, NOW!" Daft fucking dog wasn't even aware he was in trouble. He just ran off toward Terry, happy as a lark, tail wagging.

I opened my eyes, half excited, half terrified of the reaction the blonde on top of me would have.

"Jesus Sheppard of Judea!" Blondie said and immediately looked shocked at her own words and tried to move her hand, I assumed to cover her mouth, but my arms were wrapped around her in a death grip.

I loosened my arms gingerly. There was an almost comical moment of fumbling around as we tried to get up without rubbing things against _other_ things. Finally, she was upright and I was still flat on the ground – I didn't think I had hurt myself, but jumping up didn't seem like a great idea. A small, manicured hand came into view.

"Need a hand?" said a sweet southern accent. Thought it may have been Louisiana.

I sat up slowly, took her hand, and stood up. I just couldn't let go of her hand yet though. She chuckled.

"You okay?"

"Hmmm …."

"Think I can have my hand back? Promise I won't run away."

"Promise?"

"Ya, promise."

I let go of her hand, and mercifully, she stayed put.

"Listen, I'm sorry about Bill, he's …."

"A dog. No harm done thanks to your fancy foot work. But how you doin'? I'm not exactly light as a feather."

"I'm just fine ma'am thanks." Huh, I hadn't called anyone ma'am for years, not since Eric told me if I wanted the job, I'd have to get rid of the Texan accent.

"Texas?"

"Yes ma'am … Louisiana?"

"Yup, south of Shreveport."

"I'm Sam by the way," I offered my hand again.

"Sookie Stackhouse," she accepted the shake. "You're doing it again Sam."

"Huh?"

"My hand?"

"Oh hell, sorry."

"It's okay; it's nice to meet you too," a brilliant smile crossed her cherry lips.

I dropped her hand and decided it was now or never. "So, seeing as how my dog damn near killed you, I think it's only fair that I buy you a drink."

"Tell you what, make that an iced tea and you got a deal."

"Iced tea … Southern girl through and through huh?"

"Well Mr. Sam …."

"… Merlotte."

"Well Mr. Sam Merlotte from Texas, I'll bet you my gramndmama's creamed corn recipe there's a bottle of your mama's BBQ sauce in your kitchen right now."

I busted out laughing. There sure as hell was a bottle of my Mama's sauce in the kitchen. She sent me one every month without fail.

"Caught me red handed. When and where can I pick you up?"

"About the only place I know here yet is my friend's place where I'm staying, and Central Park of course."

I got her friend's address and told her to be ready at seven. I collected my stuff, including Bill who was definitely not getting a treat later. When I got home, I showered and got ready. Normally, I would have put on a pair of loafers or something with my jeans and black button down, but instead, I slipped on my boots. Something told me Sookie wouldn't mind. I was at her friend's apartment building just a few minutes early and when Sookie walked out the front door I was a grinning fool.

She was wearing a black sundress with red cherries over it, and a pair of matching red heels. I don't need to tell you she looked good enough to eat. Her blond hair was wavy and 'round her shoulders, her blue eyes were sparkling. She had soft hips and not a single bone protruded from her body. The women of New York had nothing on Sookie.

"You look amazing."

"Nice boots." I think that may have been the very moment I fell for her.

I took her hand and hailed a cab. A few moments later, we got out and she laughed. I had sort of hoped she would, too. It popped into my mind when she said the only places she knew in the city were her friend's apartment and Central Park. The Park was a fun restaurant that had trees growing throughout it, hence the name. There was also a great terrace bar upstairs that looked onto the downtown skyline. Something told me she might like it.

"The Park?"

"Ya, thought you might get a kick out of it. So I know I promised you iced tea, but how about some food with it?"

"I never turn down a meal," hell, she was my kind of girl.

We both ordered steak, we both had iced tea, and in true girly fashion, she didn't order desert but instead attacked mine. I didn't care though. Watching Sookie eat chocolate cake was something I'll never forget. With every bite she closed her eyes, savoring the taste. I even heard a moan once or twice. It was the sweetest torture.

We went upstairs after dinner. The night was warm but breezy. She loved the terrace. You could see to the water and all around Chelsea from up there. There were lanterns illuminating the space and a soft constant thumping coming from the speakers. She glowed in the light. I got myself a beer and a diet coke with a cherry in it for Sookie. That was just the cutest and sexiest damn thing I ever did hear a girl order.

We sat on a bench covered with pillows under the city skyline and talked for hours. She had left her home town of Bon Temps almost exactly a year after her Grandmother died and right after her brother's wedding. Her parents died when she was just seven in a car crash, and her grandmother had raised her and her brother Jason. But, she needed a change - there was nothing left for her in Bon Temps. Grandma gone, her brother starting a new chapter of his life. Her ex and one of her best friends who had been married for year had their first baby a few months before she left … I think she felt left out and kinda lonely.

She called up a friend she had made in New Orleans one summer. She thought maybe she'd go to there for a bit. Instead, she found out through her friend's father that Amelia had moved to New York. She got the number and when Amelia found out that Sookie was looking for something new, she'd offered her the second bedroom without thinking twice. So she had been in New York for exactly three weeks. She had no idea what to do with herself yet, but money was running out. She was gonna need a job soon.

I thought I just might be able to help there. She had waitressing experience and I knew enough people in the restaurant world to find her something, I was sure. She hugged me when I offered. Her soft body pressed up against mine. I didn't want to let go. When she cleared her throat I knew I had been holding on too long.

"Is this a chronic problem you have Sam? Not letting go of people?"

"No. It's just you."

"Oh," she said as she smiled and turned her head. I couldn't be sure, but I thought she may have been blushing.

It was well past midnight when I finally dropped her off. I would have stayed out with her all night, but I had to work a full shift at the bar and I needed at least some sleep. I gave Sookie the address to Viking Bar and told her to bring Amelia. Drinks would be on me.

Now normally, I would have gone in for a kiss, a full on kiss. But Sookie was a southern girl and I was liable to get a solid slap in the puss for that. So before she turned away to walk into the building, I leaned in and kissed her cheek. It was risky, I'll admit. But when all I got was a smile, a little wave goodbye, and a subtle little ass wiggle as she walked up the steps to the door of the building, I knew I was safe.

I was anxious all night. I had no idea if she would show up or not. Pam, the manager, picked up on it immediately.

"Jesus Sam, what the hell's wrong with you?"

A bottle of gin slipped through my fingers, crashing to the mats under my feet.

"Aww Christ on crutches."

"Oh now I KNOW something's up. You never let your accent slip."

"Pam, what's the likelihood of you dropping this?"

"About as likely as me cleaning that mess up. Hey Hector! HECTOR! Where the hell is that guy? HEEEECTORRR! You better spill it Sam, we open in twenty and I'll make your night a living hell if I don't find out." Hector showed up with a bucket and a mop.

As we shuffled away to let Hector clean up (he was our best outfielder by the way), I resigned myself to telling Pam everything. She would have made my night miserable if I hadn't. The last time I tried to keep something from her she palmed all my tips and wouldn't give them back until I promised to call her "Your Highness" for a week. Sobered me to the force that is Pam real quick.

When I finished with everything she snorted.

"Oh please, so some pretty little southern belle has you all tied in knots? Get over it and quick … you make more tips the more single you seem, sweet cheeks."

A slap on the ass and she was off. I got used to that a long time ago. Pam was actually gay but she liked my ass – a lot. I was annoyed for exactly two minutes the first time it happened, then I realized that even though she was with hot women every night, my ass was the one she liked to slap - kinda puffed up the ego in a totally twisted way.

It was about two hours into the night, at about 10:30pm when I saw a flash of blonde waves. I was fixing a whiskey sour for some guy when I heard "Hey Bartender, know how to make a Louisiana Lullaby? My friend and I are real thirsty!"

I turned to see blonde locks, blue eyes, and yellow frills. She was wearing some kind of wrap shirt that had yellow frilly stuff down the front. I could see a hint of cleavage and good lord it was delectable. The cute brunette must have been her friend Amelia.

"No Dubonnet Rouge cher, but I have a diet coke and maraschino with your name on it," putting on my best Cajun accent, which was pretty awful actually.

Sookie leaned over the counter and kissed me on the cheek. Every man in that room had to be jealous. I fixed Sookie's diet with cherry and a Tequila Sunrise for Amelia. Amelia reached into her purse, but I stopped her hand. "On the house, ladies." I wanted to chat, but it was a Saturday night and Viking Bar was a popular joint for the rich, trendy, and pretentious.

I was only able to get a few words in here or there before they left about an hour and a half later. Before she left though, I slipped her my number on the back of a Viking Bar card. Ball was in her court – I only hoped she'd use it.

While we closing up the bar for the night, Pam strolled over to me.

"Was that Scarlet in the yellow frills?"

"Scarlet?"

"O'Hara … you know, your southern belle?"

"Sookie, ya that was her."

"She's something Sam. Keep her away from Eric, he'll eat her alive."

**A/N**

**Ok, so here's the real test. You want more? The only way I know if you do is to press that lonely green button. **

**-Zhiv**


	3. Ch 2, July 1999

**So I've had some positive feedback! Thanks so much. I'm going to keep going with this little experiment, but I always want to hear from you. **

**Pixiegiggles made me giggle and also happened to whip my commas into shape… again. **

**I don't own them, but if Sam were Ken and Sookie were Barbie, they would totally be rocking the dream house right now. **

**PS FF is a total fail with the spacing, sorry this all looks so scrunched. Also, it doesn't want to accept things being underlined, *sigh*  
**

**Sam POV**

**July 1999**

July 4th was amazing … July 5th was shit.

I don't know how, but I convinced Pam to let me have July 4th off. Not that July 4th was so busy - most people were away. But Pam liked making people work on holidays, made her all tingly inside. A friend who lived just outside of the city had a house with a pool and was throwing a BBQ. The second I mentioned it to Sookie she lit up. She hadn't been outside of the city since she got there and hadn't been to a BBQ since the previous summer. We had been on a couple of dates – easy simple dates. I didn't want to be pushy; we hadn't gone past the chaste goodnight kiss, but I was ready for more. More tongue, more skin, more of Sookie in any way I could get her. I hoped July 4th could be the push we needed.

I picked her up in a rental car at nine. As I drove up, I could see Sookie was wearing a white sundress, a pair of sandals that wrapped around her ankles, sunglasses on her head, a massive straw bag, and had a huge red, white, and blue bowl covered in foil in her arms. She looked good enough to eat, but then again, she always did. She opened the car door and handed me the bowl, which was cold and damn heavy. She threw her bag in the back and settled into the seat, buckling her belt.

"Ya'll ready?" I asked, amused by her wiggling and shifting before she snapped her belt buckle in place.

"Yup, just hand me the bowl. You can't drive like that."

"Yes ma'am. What is it anyway?" I asked as I handed it over.

"Ham salad."

Bless her southern heart. I hadn't had ham salad since I left Texas. Well, that wasn't true. I suffered through a friend's attempt at ham salad one night early in my New York days. I'd spent the night moaning and wondering if I had made the right choice, went on and on about stupid things like decent coleslaw and cornbread. She knew I was home sick and thought she'd make something to cheer me up. Oh I ate the stuff, but I couldn't rightfully tell you if it was actually ham salad or not.

"You know you didn't -" before I could even finish the sentence she cut me off.

"Sam Merlotte! Gran would roll over in her grave if she even thought for one second that I would go to someone's house for a BBQ and not make something!"

Was it too early to say I love you?

When the twenty pounds of ham salad got too heavy for her, (which couldn't have been more than about 15 minutes), she twisted and shifted until she could reach to set it on the back seat. Once we got on the highway, we stopped for some coffee and muffins and made it to Terry's house just after eleven.

Terry had been my first friend in the city. He was my next door neighbor. We met when he helped me assemble my new bed. I think it was the third round of cursing and banging that got his attention. Now, don't get me wrong, I could build you a house complete with a porch swing given the time, but putting together a Swedish designed bed with Chinese instructions was not one of my talents.

When Terry knocked on my door with a six pack and a bucket full of nails and a hammer, it was all I could do not to hug the guy. We got through the beers quickly and with good ol' American determination and a fuck load of nails, we got the sucker together … eventually. We'd been buds since then.

Terry wasn't exactly a happy guy - he was a desert storm vet with shot nerves. He'd had years of therapy, been on anti-anxiety pills for just as long, and still had a hard time keeping it together. He didn't seem to have very many friends; I think he made people nervous. He never spoke about family and I never asked. He made it by on odd jobs, but just barely. I never did understand why he lived in New York - it was too loud and fast for him. A guy like Terry belonged in a house, on a nice quiet piece of land where he could tinker and fix and build things.

So in 1997, when Terry met Arlene at a diner outside of New York, it was life stepping in to help out a once-shattered man. He was on another odd job, restoring an old barn on farmland in Duchess County and had found the diner off the side of the road for lunch. Arlene was a head of kool-aid-bright red hair with a personality to match. She had two kids from a previous marriage and lived in a huge rambling old house that was falling to pieces. I think it was no more than three months before Terry told me he was moving, marrying, and becoming a daddy.

I was thrilled for the guy. I'd never seen him happier or more at ease. Something about the big old house, the kids who he took to him immediately, and Arlene, of course, made him whole again. He had a purpose, something to wake up for now. He slowly but surely restored the house that had been in Arlene's family for almost 200 years to its original glory. He put in a pool, fixed the garden too. I'll be damned if that place didn't belong on the cover of a magazine. After that, he started his own little restoration and fix-it business out there – and he did pretty good. They weren't rich, but they were comfortable and happy.

When we parked in the driveway, it was little Coby who came running to greet us as we got out of the car. He was now eight, and his older sister Lisa was 10.

"Uncle Sam!" he ran toward me and damn near knocking me over. I twirled him around as I grabbed him.

"Coby, you little monster," I set him down, "lord you got heavy!"

I put him down and noticed him staring at a certain blonde. "Coby, this is my friend Sookie."

Sookie handed me the bowl and kneeled down to greet Coby.

"It's a pleasure to meet you, Coby."

"You're pretty," he said, grinning from ear to ear. Sookie laughed wholeheartedly.

"I wish everyone said hello like that! Can you show me where the kitchen is Coby?"

"Sure can!" He said proudly as he took Sookie's hand and dragged her away, leaving me with the twenty pound bowl of ham salad.

I trailed behind and found Sookie in the kitchen getting hugged by Arlene – she hugged everyone. I opened the fridge to set down the salad, but it was too full to fit another thing.

"Sam, why are you in my kitchen?"

"I'm just here to deliver the ham salad, ma'am."

"How much ham salad is there? And since when do you cook?" She looked a little worried thinking back on it now.

"'Bout twenty pounds I'd say, and it was all Sookie."

"Sookie, you know you didn't have to."

"Of course I did!" and she went on about her Gran rolling over in her grave. After that, there was a fork and a taste and Arlene's eyes rolled back into her head. Somewhere between what kind of mayo to use and how much salt, I stepped out back to let the women be.

I found Terry by the grill lighting the coals.

"Sam, she here?"

"Yeah, talking to Arlene about her ham salad recipe."

"She cooks too?"

"Seems like."

"Hold on to her, man."

"You're the second person to tell me that."

The rest of the day was amazing. It wasn't too hot, the food was great, the ham salad made me cry it was so good, and then came pool time. I was sure Sookie would look good in anything, even a Mumu, but when she went inside to change into her bikini? Good lord. She was every pin up, every fantasy that any red blooded American boy ever had. She was Farah Fawcett and Cindy Crawford. Curves and smooth skin as far as the eye could see. I'll never forget it (and I don't think Coby has either).

She was perfect for me. Ham salad, southern charm, feisty, beautiful, and a body that made me wanna fall to my knees in thanks. I wouldn't be letting her go – she was special and I knew it. Everyone she met knew it too. Absolutely everyone.

It was dark by the time we left, laden down with leftovers that would last us a week at least. Sookie loved Terry, Arlene and the kids as I hoped she would, and I knew the whole family felt the same way about her. Lisa wanted to go to Bon Temp to swim in the lake down there and see Sookie's old house. Colby was in love, Arlene thought she was great, and Terry was just happy that he saw I was happy. I wasn't nervous about it, but Terry and Arlene were the closest thing I had to family outside of Texas, and it meant the world to me that they liked her so much.

I dropped her off at about ten later that night – it was a long but great day. I was nervous as a teenager. Did I kiss her? Did I walk her to the door? I wanted more, but I didn't want to seem too eager. Sweet Sookie helped me on both counts. She unbuckled her belt, leaned over the console, and kissed me square on the lips. Before my body and mind could coordinate to grab her, not let her go, kiss her back, anything … she had left the car and was making her way through the lobby. I sat there like an idiot, in awe, giddy like a fool before a cabbie behind me started in on his horn. I'm shocked I didn't crash on my way back to the rental place that night. I called her the very next day. I left a message on Amelia's machine asking her to come to the bar that night. I was gonna make a major move. I wasn't sure what that move was gonna be, but I was thinking along the lines of bare skin and heavy petting. I was already cursing myself for not making the first move on the kiss— I wasn't gonna miss the chance again.

Sookie showed up early on in my shift. She was wearing a black dress with a ruffled skirt and bright yellow heels; there was a yellow flower in her hair, too. She looked all dressed up and I couldn't help but smile that she had done it for me. I puffed my chest out and made her a coke with a cherry in it before winking at her and helping some other early customers.

I watched as she turned down other men's advances. I listened to her laugh with another woman who sat down next to her – Sookie was pointing to some lady's bag, the woman was pointing to her flower. She could talk to anyone, and everyone seemed charmed by her.

I came by to check on her whenever I could. She seemed content to just be there talking to me and others as they came by. As the night went on, we got more and more flirty. Winking, smiling, laughing, exchanging knowing little head nods. She wasn't mine yet, but I was gonna do everything I could to make sure she would be.

It was just past 11 when Pam came to find me.

"Enough flirting with Scarlet, Sam. Eric's back."

"He's not supposed to be back until the end of July, though!"

I didn't mean for it to come out panicky, but Pam's warning was looming in my mind. _Keep her away from Eric, he'll eat her alive_. He was supposed to be in Bali or Tahiti, or someplace, with the latest love of his life. She was yet another of the many tall, leggy, size zero actress or model types who wore the latest, most expensive clothing and was a complete no-brained mindless robot. He had a type all right, but that wouldn't stop him from moving in on a short curvy blonde from Louisiana.

Eric was over six feet and broad. He had long blonde hair and piercing blue eyes. He wore the latest fashions, spoke four or five languages, had a penthouse in Soho, was wealthy, and had a driver. He was hard to resist, I got it. Although he had been in New York most of his life, he was actually from Sweden and could lay the accent on real thick when he thought a girl would get hot under the collar for that kind of thing. Mr. Perfect found the love of his life at least three times a year. The rest of the year was spent bedding the two percent of the female population of New York that he hadn't fucked yet. Sookie was in that two percent.

Sookie was giving me a quizzical look. I reminded myself that Sookie wasn't like that. She wouldn't be dazzled by the money and cars. She was a simple girl with simple tastes. I needed to have faith in her and in myself. I was right for her, and we would be great together. There was nothing to worry about, right?

"Hey darlin'. The owner just got back from vacation, apparently he just pulled up front."

"Oh. I can leave Sam, it's no problem. I don't want to distract you after all," she said, a sexy little smile playing on her lips.

I struggled not to moan. Instead, I leaned over the bar and kissed her – quicker than I would have liked. She looked a little surprised but then winked, smiled again, and gathered her bag.

"Call me tomorrow, okay?"

"Yes ma'am."

I turned away to tend to some customers. A moment later, I heard her ringing laughter. I turned to see Sookie looking up at Eric. He was smiling his best come-and-fuck-me smile at her, a smile I'd seen hundreds of times. It almost always led to his latest victim following him to his back office where conveniently there was a black leather couch. Eric had Sookie's purse in one hand and his other arm was snaking itself around Sookie's waist.

Like I said, July 5th was shit.

**A/N**

**Dun dun dun! ****You knew they had to meet sometime right? **

**I'd like to institute a recommendation policy. Let me know your favorite stories or authors and I'll post every 25****th**** review. Feel free to self promote! I'm always up for reading something unknown and wonderful, or maybe there's an established story you need to sqee about – give it all to me. SVM, Twilight, Harry Potter? Anything goes, just let me know. **

**So… umm want more? Questions? Concerns? You know what to do.**


	4. Ch 3, July 6, 1999

**Thanks for the reviews, so far so good! I promised a reader I would try to write a Sookie POV and I have - hope I delivered. **

**Sorry for this coming a little late! Between my 30****th**** and Comic Con, things got a little delayed. Thanks, as always, to Pixiegiggles who really lived up to her name this chapter… there were more "giggle-snorts" in her editing comments than I could count! Hehe ;-)**

**Sadly, I don't own any of it. I do however own a very well loved copy of The Breakfast Club, (reference to be made clear later in the chapter).**

**Sookie POV**

**July 6, 1999**

"Oomph!"

I walked right into a brick wall - but there wasn't a wall behind me, right?

Opening my eyes, I realized that my brick wall was actually clad in a dark blue suit jacket, black button down shirt and smelled like lemons and sage. I watched the wall bend down in front of me and come back up with my purse in his hand. I looked up and found myself staring into crystal blue.

I wobbled a little since my damn body wanted to swoon, when a firm, steadying arm wrapped itself around my waist.

He chuckled.

I chuckled back and took a better look at my wall. He was tall, good lord was he tall. He had long blonde hair pulled back in a tight ponytail. His strong features were offset by his dazzling smile, and oh my … was that Mr. Happy saying hello around my hips?

"Thank you Mr. …."

"Eric. Eric Northman. This is my bar you're gracing."

Ahhh, so this was Eric. Slick, but I wasn't buying the line—even if he was drool worthy. I had a long history of falling for the pretty guy and learned my lesson the hard way.

"That's sweet, thanks. I really have to go now, though."

"Oh of course, excuse me," he said, letting my waist go and bowing slightly while holding my purse out for me.

If I hadn't been positive all he wanted was to get into my pants, I would have been flattered. As it was, I could smell the sexual prowess coming off of him in waves, and if I didn't skedaddle within the next few minutes, I just knew I'd be a puddle of mush in his capable hands. Even thinking of the words, sexual and hands, had my hormones buzzing. That was my cue; I took my bag and walked away.

It was breezy when I got outside, and I felt a drop of rain fall on my nose. It was going to rain any second. I walked to the street to try and hail a cab when a voice behind me yelled, "Wait!"

I turned to see Eric running up to me.

"I didn't get your name."

Ugh. Did I tell him my name? I didn't want to but I could practically hear Gran yelling at me from her grave - I didn't have it in me to be that rude. With a sigh I answered the man, "Sookie."

"Well Sookie, it's starting to rain and it's a Saturday night—you won't get a cab anytime soon," he said somewhat cockily.

_Gee thanks. _"Thanks. Train it is then."

As I started walking away, he called out to me again.

"A beautiful woman such as yourself shouldn't be on the train alone this late at night. Would you let my driver take you home?"

Shit. This was bad. This was really, really bad. I knew myself well enough to know that if I was gracious and accepted, and then if he took it as anything other than me being practical, he could assume something from me saying yes. Then, if he did something really sweet again – there would be no resisting the man. I was determined not to go down that path again, either. I got into way too much trouble when it came to pretty boys and sweet words.

Three names came to mind as further proof of my weakness: J.B., Alcide, and Quinn.

Of course, the second I had decided to say no, to take the damn train and to hell with the midnight loonies, the heavens opened and began pouring on me. The worst part? My brand new yellow heels; they'd just be totally ruined now! Did I really have a choice?

"That's real generous of you Eric. Thank you," I said through the downpour.

One flip of his cell and two minutes later, a warm, dry, slick black car stopped in front of me. A man came jogging around the car with an open umbrella. As I stood there under the umbrella while Eric stood beside me getting impossibly wetter, the silliest thought popped into my head.

"Eric, I'll ruin your seats."

What that sly son-of-bitch said next made my knees turn to Jello. "I doubt you could ruin anything, Sookie." Of course, he followed that by kissing my hand and then ushering me into the car. He closed the door as I got in and we drove off after I told the driver my address.

The following day I woke up sneezing and shivering, my nose was beet red and my hair looked like a rat's nest. Amelia heard my oh-so-lady-like nose blows and honking and stuck her head in.

"Hmmm, someone needs mint tea and toast with honey."

"Oh lord, yes please!" I got out before I let a monstrous sneeze loose.

The buzzer sounded just as Amelia was dropping off my tray. She handed it to me and went to answer it.

A few moments later she came back with a large shopping bag in her hand. She set down the bag, handed me the card that came with it, and sat at the side of the bed.

I opened the card and smiled ear to ear.

_Dear Sunshine,_

_Heard about last night, so sorry I wasn't there to help with the cab. _

_Just in case you needed something warm after your "shower" though,_

_thought I'd have this delivered to you. _

_After we beat La Concina's ass today, I'd like to stop by?_

_See you later, _

_Always, Sam._

"I'm dying here! What is it?"

I handed Amelia the card and opened the shopping bag to find two large containers of chicken noodle soup.

"Aww! God that was sweet, Sook!"

It really was. It was just about the sweetest damn thing anyone had done for me in a long time, too. Before we could both gush over the gesture though, the buzzer rang again. Amelia and I gave each other confused looks before she got up again, leaving me to sneeze again.

A minute later I could hear Amelia thanking someone at the door and locking it.

"Holy shit, Sookie! You sure you didn't leave anything out? What the hell did you do last night?"

I told her the whole story last night when I walked through the door dripping and furious over my pumps. I didn't really feel like going through it all again either, "I told you already Ame why …." But before I could finish my sentence, I knew exactly why she had asked me again.

Cradled in Amelia's arms was a massive silver vase filled with enough yellow flowers to hide her entire head! She set them down on the chest of drawers across from me and handed me yet another card.

_Beautiful,_

_For some reason all I could think of last night was yellow flowers …._

_många kyssar, Eric_

I looked at the now dry pile of clothes on the floor next to my bed. Right on top of the pile that was my dress, and next to my now-ruined yellow heels, was the nylon yellow rose I had stuck in my hair last night. It had been a whim, just a last minute addition. I had felt like I was wearing too much black, I had to jazz it up somehow … when I saw Amelia's hair clip in the bathroom, I just stuck it in my hair. Who knew that silly little clip would lead to all this nonsense?

"Amelia?"

"Ya?"

"What does, manga kyssar mean?"

"No idea. Why?"

I handed her Eric's card.

"Oh. My. God!"

She ran out of the room. Five minutes later she was back with a piece of paper in her hands.

"Found it online. Pussah or kyss means kiss in Swedish."

"Christ. And manga kyssar?"

She paused, then smiled before answering, "Many kisses."

"SHIT!" I yelled and immediately covered my mouth with my hand, which then in turn immediately started a coughing fit.

Amelia ran to get me a glass of water. I took a few gulps when I was finally able to breathe again .

"So Sook, what-cha-gonna-do?" She asked me all sing-songy and smiley from the insane situation I had just found myself in.

I had no idea, but it was a damn good question.

**Sam POV**

It wasn't an easy win, but it was a win nonetheless.

Thanks to the previous night's downpour, it was muddy and slick as hell out there. We were determined though. If we beat La Cocina we'd be playing Izumi for the championship, and we wanted that real bad. It was hard to concentrate though. Besides Eric's little display at the bar, I found out there was a second act outside in the rain thanks to Pam's big mouth.

All I could think of was Sookie, wet and cold, while Eric pulled up on his white horse. It bugged the shit out of me, but there was nothing I could do about it. Well there was _something_ I could do. Before I ran to the game I called a buddy, one of the managers of the Second Avenue Deli. I told him the situation, and even though it was way out of their delivery zone, he had someone drop off two large containers of their chicken soup at Sookie's place. I didn't know if she was sick or not, but even if she wasn't, that soup was irresistible.

After the win, we all split up. We were a muddy, messy crew, but happy and excited, too. Bill was caked in mud and I wasn't much better. We made it home, and I hosed Bill off in the street with the hose the super's wife left outside to water the flower beds with. I hosed my feet off too while I was at it. It was a full hour later before I felt clean enough to even call Sookie.

"Hello?"

"Hey, Amelia. Is Sookie there."

"Ya, in bed."

"Sick?"

"Yup, red nose and all."

"So the soup was a good call?"

"Ya, it was perfect," but she sounded unsure somehow. "Uh, let me hand you over to Sookie."

"Thanks, Amelia."

A little shuffling later and "heya Sam," which sounded more like _'tham.'_

"Hey sweet girl, you got it bad huh?"

"Ya."

"Well, I can stop by the video store on my way over?" There was a pause, it sounded like she was saying something to Amelia. "Sookie?"

"Oh ya, well … I was gonna say no, but movies sound great actually."

"Anything else?"

"More tissues. Oh and chocolate!"

"Chocolate?"

"What? My throat hurts, Gran always gave me chocolate to suck on when my throat hurt."

I had to stop the images of Sookie sucking on chocolate because I was sure it was way less sexy than it sounded—but man it sounded hot!

"Ok sunshine, I'll be there in an hour with tissues, movies and chocolate."

"Thanks, Sam. You're the best."

An hour later and I was at Amelia and Sookie's door with two boxes of the softest tissues the store had, two Hershey bars, and three John Hugh's movies. Girls loved those damned things. I'd happily suffer through Breakfast Club for Sookie any day, though.

When Amelia let me in, Sookie was already on the couch in a pair of pajamas that had bunches of cherries on them. She completed the look with a pair of socks. Her hair was braided, and she had a tissue in one hand and a mug in the other. Her nose was Rudolph-the-Reindeer-red and she looked … absolutely adorable.

"Chocolate?" was the first thing out of her mouth.

I reached into the bag and pulled out the Hershey bar—her face lit up.

"My savior!" she said seriously. The girl really liked her chocolate; I'd have to remember that.

I walked over and sat on the couch next to her. I had never been in the apartment before, but I could see through to the kitchen just on the left of me, and the bathroom was straight ahead. Amelia walked into her room across from the kitchen and I noticed a huge vase of yellow flowers next to her four poster bed.

"Wow Amelia, is it your birthday?"

"Huh?" She yelled from the other room. "No, why?"

"That two ton vase of flowers is why."

"Oh, that!" she said, flustered. "Oh umm—blind date last night."

"Must have gone really, really well!"

"Yes! It was great."

"What's the lucky guy's name?"

"Name?"

I laughed. "Ya name. Like, my name is Sam?"

"Tray. His name is Tray."

"Well, good luck with that."

"Thanks, in fact, um … I'm just on my way to meet with him again," she said as she stepped back out of her room, bag in hand. "So, you two kids have fun, okay?"

"Bye, Amelia," Sookie said as she waved from her spot on the couch.

"Night guys."

She walked out and locked the door.

"Did she seem kind of, I dunno … jumpy or something to you?"

"No. Probably just anxious about her date."

"Right. So what's first? Breakfast Club, Sixteen Candles, or Pretty in Pink?"

"Sam Merlotte!" She said, all smiles. "How could you possibly know?"

"Gut instinct."

"I think I love you right now. Breakfast Club."

I knew she didn't mean it that way, but it felt so good to hear. I walked to the DVD player and popped in the movie before settling myself back on the couch. Twenty minutes into the movie, Sookie snuggled up next to me. My arm wrapped around her shoulders. It felt so right, so comfortable. I could imagine us doing the same thing five, ten, twenty years down the road.

Sometime between the dancing scene and the makeover, Sookie fell asleep. I didn't know if she normally snored or if it was the stuffy nose, but even that was endearing. She sounded like a puppy—like Bill had when he was only as big as my forearm. I turned off the DVD player and the TV, then carefully scooped her up and maneuvered around the coffee table to the door that had to be her room.

She had an old, worn-out patchwork quilt on her bed that looked well loved. I pulled the quilt back with one arm and laid her down before tucking her in. On her bedside table was a glass of water, a box of tissues, an old milk glass lamp with a white lampshade fringed with faded gold tassels, and a picture of a graceful smiling woman with a head of white hair, I could only assume this was 'Gran.' I said a silent thank you to the woman who meant so much to Sookie before returning my attentions back to sleeping beauty.

She looked so lovely asleep. She was dreaming, her eyes were moving beneath her lids. Laying carefully beside her, and propping myself up on an elbow, I moved a lock of hair from her face and pulled the quilt up to her neck. I didn't want to leave her alone, she was sick after all. What if she woke up coughing and needed something? I promised myself I'd only stay until Amelia came home. I got comfortable and watched her sleep, but couldn't help how heavy my lids got after an hour. I closed my eyes— just for a short while. It was only past 6pm, but having played a game earlier in the day, when sleep came knocking, I went under.

**A/N**

**So, the plot thickens. **

**Thank you all for the recommendations, as I said before, the 25****th**** one will get posted!**

**So, give it to me straight, or crooked, just give it to me via that little green button…**


	5. Ch 4, January 2000

**Ok, time to speed things up a bit. **

**Things get a little heavy at the end there. I don't like writing that stuff, but if it were all rainbows and unicorns would you keep reading? Nope, no, probably not. **

**Have to thank Zeewriter for beta-ing this chappie. Thank you for being my coma queen, Zee! **

**I'll be on vacay next week and hopefully not turning on the computer once (please good weather, please good weather). So next chapter will be week after next.  
**

**I don't own them, I only wish I did. **

**...  
**

**Sam POV**

**January, 2000**

I stayed at Eric's bar as long as I could before I couldn't stomach it anymore. Somehow, Eric had won Sookie. That alone made me bitter and angry, but being around Eric all the time, especially seeing Eric and Sookie together? It was too much, I couldn't do it. The worst part? Sookie was so fucking happy.

The salt on the festering wound though was Eric's behavior. He had changed. He no longer looked at other women. He didn't bring anyone to his back office unless it was Sookie, of course. If there was any more proof I needed that Sookie was some kind of magical fairy, I couldn't think of it. New York's man-whore of the century had been reformed by a spitfire of a girl from Louisiana.

It was the Thursday after News Years Eve, 2000 that I quit. I walked into Eric's office and told him I was done, I was finished. He was such a dick about it, too.

"Is this about Sookie, Sam? Look, I know you had your little crush…"

Fucking ass.

"…but she's with me now. I love that girl, Sam, you just have deal with that."

Double fucking ass.

"Listen here Eric," I said letting every once of the Texas boy out, "you don't deserve her and you never will. You should be thanking every god you've ever heard of that she decided to love you."

"God had nothing to do with it, Sam. The better man won here, don't be a sore loser."

"You think this is all a game? Who do you think she'll come crying to when you fuck up, huh? Who's gonna be there for her when this charade you're putting up crumbles?"

"Not going to happen. I love that woman and I'm not planning on fucking up." I wish I could say he winced, winked, or frowned, anything to give away his true whorish nature, but that man was stone faced. He really meant what he was saying… or at least he thought he did.

"I hope for her sake you mean that."

"You think you're such a catch, Sam? You have no job, no money, all you have is a dumb fucking dog. God, you are such a sad old country song that I feel sorry for you. In fact, why don't leave with your tail between your legs just like that mutt of yours."

"You'll never be able to give her what she needs and you know it," I seethed threw clenched teeth.

"I can give her everything! Houses, the best clothing, trips around the world, anything she desires! And she'll get it all too!"

I looked at him in disbelief. He was clueless, abso-fucking-lutely clueless. I started laughing; it was all I could do.

"What the hell is so funny?"

"She's not one of your models, Eric. You can't just shower her in diamonds and trips to the beach. She needs a man who will be there for her when she's sick. Someone who knows what her favorite movie is, someone who will put her happiness before his."

"Oh I see, and that someone is you, is it? You know everything about her don't you, Sam? Tell me something, do you know how to make her scream your name with just your tongue?"

_FUCK!_ I stayed quiet, because, hell, no I did not. However, given the chance I would spend every waking hour figuring it out - I just needed the word from her. That wasn't going to happen though. I walked out of Eric's office to the sound of him laughing at me. It was the first and last time he'd ever laugh at me again.

Pam caught up with me while I was putting my coat on.

"Sam!"

I turned to see a very worried looking Pam jogging toward me. It was a new look for her. I'd never seen her anything more than calm, cool, and collected since I'd first met her.

"You ok, Pam?"

"I kind of heard what happened in there."

"Okay…" I answered cautiously still unsure why she seemed so concerned.

"What are you going to do?"

"You heard him, I've lost. So I'm leaving with my tail between my legs."

"I don't give a shit about your and Eric's fascination with Scarlet." Ahhh, there was the Pam I knew. "I mean what are you going to do about a job, about money?"

"I don't rightfully know, Pam. I have some money saved up."

"That's it? You have some money put away? Oh, well, that solves everything then." I could feel the sarcasm washing over me.

"Pam, what the hell do you want me to say here?"

"I want you to say you want to open your own bar but you don't have enough start up cash."

Huh? "Huh?"

"Please don't make me call you a dumb hick; you've suffered enough indignity for the day."

"Umm… I want to open my own bar but I don't have enough start up cash?" I repeated back to her, adding the question at the end since I was thoroughly confused.

"Good boy. Meet me at the corner of Avenue B and fifth at ten tomorrow morning."

"Okay?"

"You learn so fast! I'm so proud of you!" With that final Pam-ism, she turned around and sashayed away from me.

The following morning I was freezing my ass of at the corner of Avenue B and Fifth Street. It was a quarter past ten and there was no sign of Pam. Typical. I was about to start hopping up and down when I heard her yelling from somewhere behind me.

"Jesus its cold out there, come on in, I have coffee brewing." I turned around and looked up to see Pam's head sticking out of the top floor window. "Buzz apartment eight."

A few minutes later I was in front of Pam's apartment. It was unlocked and I could smell coffee beckoning me in. I walked through, closed the door behind me, hung my coat up in the closet and let my nose lead me through a surprisingly huge loft apartment to a kitchen. Pam was sitting by the breakfast bar on a stool, wrapped in a purple silk Kimono.

"Help yourself, Sam, there's some warmed milk on the stove."

I fixed myself a cup, and sat down at the bar on the other available stool.

"Pam, this place is amazing, how long have you been here?"

"It didn't used to be amazing. It was a shithole tenement building like all the others around here before I got my hands on it. After I bought the building three years ago, I ripped up every apartment and made them all large loft style-apartments. You know each floor had four apartments on it? Four! Soooo much nicer now. Of course I gave myself the top floor and the roof. If it weren't so damn cold I'd show you the garden, but I think you'll forgive me."

"You own the whole building huh?"

"Eric pays me well."

"I guess so."

"So shall I get to the point?"

"Yup."

"Did you notice the ground floor?"

"Just that there was a gate down."

"Right, well it used to be this seriously pretentious Japanese place. I hated it with a passion but they paid me the ridiculous rent I demand on time every month. Anyway, Mr. Uezu moved his family back to the motherland and now I have an empty space just waiting to be occupied…" a little eyebrow wiggle at the end brought the message home.

"You want _me_ in there?"

"Look Sam, you work hard, there's no bullshit, and customers like you. It would be your place completely I just want a cut of the profits."

"Silent partner."

"Very silent. I only ask that you keep the place clean and quiet, and for god sake nothing too pretentious. I don't think I could take those god awful snobs loitering around my building anymore."

"Rent? Start up? Purchasing costs, remodeling?"

"We'll work it all out. But first, you want to see it?"

"Ya, hell ya, I do."

I was somewhere between excited and stupefied. Of all the scenarios running through my head, this was not one of them. Pam wanted to back me. I was opening my own bar in Alphabet City and it was gonna be mine. No stupid lights, no silly chairs so low you couldn't get out of them, no red rope, no hiding my damn accent!

Pam took a large loop of keys from her coat pocket and unlocked the grate. Once up, she unlocked the door and fumbled around for the lights. When the lights came on it was everything I despised. It was all white. Everything was white, the floors, the ceiling, the chairs so low you couldn't get out of them… the only color in the whole place were large black Japanese characters sprawled on the wall—definitely not the décor of a local neighborhood bar.

"I know it needs work, but I figure we could get it ready by April, don't you?"

"I guess so. What did ya have in mind for the place?"

"No, no, no, I don't want anything to do with the place except taking some money off your hands. Just make it right, Sam."

She reached into her pocket for her cell and made a call while I walked around. There was a sushi bar right where my bar would go, a small kitchen but that was fine really, wasn't expecting to offer much by way of food. There was a bright red bathroom complete with rock garden in the corner - ya, that would have to go. Further back there was an office and a small room with five lockers in it, a door behind that led to a small walk in fridge/freezer and a surprisingly large pantry. It needed some re-doing but really, it was perfect.

I walked back out to find Pam at the sushi bar saying her goodbyes to someone.

"So, that was Calvin, he did the remodel of the building for me. He said he could be here tomorrow at three to go over your ideas. Good guy, fucked up family, but good guy."

"Three works for me."

"Well then, he'll give me the estimate when he has it, and then you'll be on your way."

She started walking toward the door but I stopped her by grabbing her arm. She turned around to look at me a little surprised by the contact.

"Pam, I don't have the words. This is all overwhelming and wonderful and I don't think I could ever repay you."

"Sure you can, you can make me be richer in a year's time if you're as good at this as I think you'll be."

"That's not what I meant."

She softened her expression, "Sam, like I said, I like you and I think you can do this and do it well. Think I would risk my money on something I didn't believe in?"

"No, but thanks just the same, this means a lot to me."

I leaned in and pecked her on the cheek.

She seemed stunned for a second, smiled a small smile, then snapped right the hell out of it.

"Ok, this Hallmark moment is over; back to our regularly scheduled programming."

I shook my head and followed her out, a big silly smile on my face. She handed me the keys, wished me good luck, and that was all I saw of Pam for almost three months.

The following day I was back and met with Calvin Norris, Pam's all around fix it and remodel guy. She was right, he was a good guy, with a real fucked up family. It's not that he broadcasted it or anything, but just by talking to the guy over some time I found out about teenage pregnancies, family robbing from other family, jail sentences, some messed up situation with two cousins having a kid, ya it was like a whole season of the Jerry Springer show wrapped up in one gene pool.

By the middle of April, we were ready to open. The walls had gone from stark white to hunter green. There was a long mahogany bar that Pam had shipped from who knows where, probably cost a fortune though. There were simple brass lights on the wall and comfortable booths in dark brown leather. Normal height tables and chairs and "Merlotte's" written in gold on the windows. It was a normal, average, comfortable bar with televisions showing the latest game and it was perfect, and mine.

Lafayette was a God-send. He walked in first thing when I was having interviews and told me that I could stop looking for a manager since he was here now. He was wearing cut off shorts, bright pink high top converse and matching scarf around his head. Gold eye shadow and a white tank top completed the look. For all his flouncing about, the guy was built, I never wanted to get on his bad side. Lafayette also knew everyone and had the right person for any job I could think of. To this day, I don't know how he did it, but he convinced me in 15 minutes to hire him on – it was the best business decision I ever made.

We opened the first of May. It was a proud moment for me. Pam and Sookie showed, even my parents flew in. It was some night. One I'll never forget. Merlotte's was a hit, too. There were no gimmicks, no themes, no blaring music and it was damn refreshing. It turned into exactly what Pam had wanted, a neighborhood bar where the freaks, geeks, jocks, grandfathers, students, artists, and everyone in-between came for a drink and some mozzarella sticks.

**...**

**September 8, 2001**

"Sam…"

"Hey Mama, think I can call you back in a few, just working on some bills here."

"Sam, honey," she paused and took a deep breath.

"Mama? You okay?"

"I…" then she burst into tears. I started panicking. "Mama, mama! Talk to me please, what's wrong. You hurt? Where's dad?"

That's when the wailing began.

"Mama…" I started slowly, "is dad ok?"

I heard a shuffling on the other end of the phone, then another voice.

"Sam, sug, it's Aunt Gladys."

"Gladys, what's going on?" I asked all nerves.

"There's no good way of saying this Sam."

"Just say it already! I'm freaking out over here."

A pause, then, "Sam, your daddy just passed."

I dropped the phone. I could hear Aunt Gladys asking me if I was still on the line from the receiver now sitting on the desk. Still in shock I picked up the phone.

"I'm here," _kind of_.

"It was his heart. We were at Lulu's house for a BBQ. Sug, I want you to know it was real quick, I don't think he suffered."

"I'll be on the first flight out," I answered flatly. It didn't even sound like my voice to me though.

I walked from the office out front where Lafayette knew something was wrong immediately.

"Sam, what's wrong?"

"My father just died. I'm leaving tonight."

"Sam, I'm so sorry, what can I do?"

"Just watch the bar for me? I don't know when I'll be back."

"Don't even have to ask, just take care of yours."

"Thanks," I said simply.

It was like I was in my body but not really. I watched myself get home and throw some things in a bag. I watched myself shuffle back downstairs and hail a cab to the airport. I watched myself get on a line and walk to the ticket lady. I watched myself buy a ticket and check my bag. Then I watched myself walk to the gate and sit there numbly. I would have to sit there for four hours too.

I didn't feel. I didn't feel sad, angry, depressed, annoyed, nothing - I was just numb, there was no other word for it. I sat there for minutes or hours, I don't really know. I was staring out the window, not really seeing anything when suddenly there was a cup of coffee in my face.

"Drink that, then eat this," a muffin joined the coffee cup.

I knew that voice. Before I even looked up I knew it was Sookie. Her hair was pulled back, her eyes were red. How did she know?

"Lafayette called me. I came as soon as I could. I'm just glad I caught you in time."

"What are you doing here, Sookie?"

"Oh, Sam," she sat down next to me, putting the muffin and coffee on an empty seat. "I won't let you do this alone. I don't care if every cousin you have is there, you're gonna need a friend."

"What about Eric?"

"What about him?"

"He ok with this?" Since I had left Eric in his office that day he and I weren't exactly best buds.

"I told him it was something I had to do; he can't say no to me anyway, you know that."

"Right, I know that."

"This isn't about him anyway. Here," she handed me the coffee. "Drink that then you eat something, Sam Merlotte. That plane food is liable to make you feel even worse."

"Sookie."

"Ya, Sam?"

"I don't_ feel_ anything."

I'll never forget what she did next. She put down the coffee cup and my hand to God, she slapped me clear across the face and damn hard too!

"Feel that?"

"Shit! What was that for?"

She never did answer me. Instead she handed me the coffee cup and the muffin. I drank and ate and felt a little less empty. I had a feeling it had nothing to do with the snack and everything to do with Sookie though. About a half hour after I had finished eating, we started boarding. Sookie and I weren't seated next to each other but she fixed that too. She said something to the guy who I was sitting next to and they switched - I wasn't really paying any attention though, instead I was looking out the window at nothing.

I tried to sleep, but my eyes wouldn't shut. It was like I was so frozen that I couldn't even nod off. Napping took too much effort. All I could so was stare and stare and stare. We landed in Houston, got off the plane, made our way to baggage claim, and got in a cab. It was all mindless though. I don't remember talking or even walking anywhere for that matter. It wasn't until we were outside my mama's house that I woke up some.

"Sam, one foot in front of the other, come on now," Sookie ordered gently.

I followed her directions. When we got to the front door, she rang the bell. I had the keys someplace, of course, but I couldn't make myself find them.

The door opened, Aunt Gladys answered.

She pulled me into a hug without saying anything. I dropped my bag and hugged back.

"She's a mess, Sam, I'm so glad you're here, sug."

I nodded into her shoulder and pulled away.

"Aunt Gladys, this is Sookie she's my…" What did I call her again?

"Sookie Stackhouse ma'am, I'm a real good friend of Sam's. Sorry to show up uninvited, but I couldn't let him go alone."

"Oh now, you call me Aunt Gladys. I'm real glad you did, I hated thinking of Sam alone on that flight. Ya'll come in, let me show the guest room, Sookie, make sure there are clean sheets and all. Sam, your Mama's in bed. The doctor's gave her a sedative to calm down. She should be up in a few hours. Come on, I got your old room all fixed up."

I nodded and followed Sookie and Aunt Gladys up the stairs. Gladys and Sookie veered left, I went straight to my old room. It wasn't all that different really. The posters were off the walls, but my bed was still pushed up against the wall, the same plaid curtains and matching comforter were in place, my desk still had my light up globe on it. The rug was new, but that was about it. I didn't know what else to do, so I dropped my bag and lay on my bed, looking strait up at the ceiling.

I don't remember falling asleep, but I woke up to the smell of something sweet. I opened my eyes slowly to the sight of blonde hair. Sookie was curled up next to me. She was molded right into the angle of my body - I could feel her body heat.

"Sleep well?"

"I think I did."

She slowly got up and shifted so she could see me.

"I don't know if you want space or not, but when my parents died, I wanted people around me all the time. I hated being alone then." She laughed, remembering something. "Then by the second week of being surrounded, I got so sick of people I would hide in the woods, only Gran knew my spot. She would find me there and sit with me as long as I needed sitting with."

She smiled at me, she was so angelic. Jesus she even smelled sweet, like what heaven must smell like.

"I can go, if you want," she said quietly.

"Stay, please." There was a long silence – it was suffocating. "Tell me more."

"Behind Gran's garden there was a stretch of woods, beyond that was the cemetery and the old Compton house. I didn't like being in the cemetery alone, but there was this massive tree stump I used to go to. It looked right onto the cemetery. It was so quiet there. No one could really see you unless they were looking either. I would sit there until the fireflies came out, then I knew it was ready to get back for dinner. Sometimes when I was gone for really long periods of time, Gran would come and sit with me. She'd braid my hair and hum. Sometimes we just sat there doing nothing. You know, it's funny, I kinda miss that old stump. I hope its still there. You think it's still there Sam?"

"Ya, I do."

"Sam, I think it's time to see your Mama."

"Right, mama. Don't disappear on me okay?"

"I'll be in the kitchen; Aunt Gladys is cooking something up."

"Sounds like Gladys."

I gave her a weak smile and made my way down the hall to my par – mama's room. I knocked, but when all I heard was a whimper I let myself in. She was on the edge of the bed, head down, I could see her shaking. It was the wake-up call I wasn't looking forward to. She heard me and turned her head. She was a shade of red I'd never seen her before. Not even that one time she fell asleep at the beach with a rum punch in her hand had she ever been this red. Her soft sniffling cry turned into a full on sob when she saw me. I acted on instinct and went to her, pulling her into my arms.

We sat on the edge of that bed for a solid hour, holding on to each other, rocking.

It was Sookie who found us there. She tiptoed in and mouthed _'dinner'_ to me. I nodded and put up a finger, _just a minute_.

"Mama, let's get some food ok? Aunt Gladys and Sookie have been cooking all afternoon."

Through sniffles I heard "Food. Wait? Sookie's here?"

"Ya mama, she surprised me at the airport, didn't want me coming alone."

"She still with that horse's ass? Lord, I bet my face is a mess!"

And just like that, she was up and in the bathroom, fixing her face. I waited for her to be done. She came out about five minutes later still sad, still broken, but by god her bright pink lipstick was on!

"Okay, let's go."

Downstairs we found the table struggling under the weight of enough food for twenty. Lucky for us, about twenty people were there too. Cousins, aunts, uncles, old family friends I hadn't seen in forever. I was surprised at how happy I was to see them. Just like Sookie told me earlier, I wanted people around. I was shocked that I did, but the more people that were there, the noisier it was, the noisier it was, the less I could think, and thinking hurt like a punch to the gut.

The next few days flew by in a blur. It was people and food and more people and even more food… must have gained ten pounds in those few days. The morning of the funeral I woke up at five am. It was pitch black still and no one was up. I knew I wouldn't get back to sleep, so I took a shower and got dressed in a black suit my cousin lent me. I was in such a state before I left New York, I didn't think to pack a suit. I sat on my bed, waiting for the house to wake up.

It was 8:45am when someone knocked lightly on my door.

"Come in."

"Hey Sam, we'll be leaving in a few minutes, just wanted to be sure you were ready," answered Sookie. I stood slowly, my knees cracking, suddenly I felt so much older.

Sookie was wearing a simple black dress. Her hair was back off her face. She was wearing a pair of pearl earrings and black shoes. In all that banality, for all the plainness of the outfit, she shone. She was perfect – like she always was to me. She came over and fussed with my tie.

"You tie this in the dark, Sam?"

"Actually, I think I did."

"Well, it looks it," fiddle, fiddle, fiddle, "ready?"

"No."

"Don't make me slap you again," she answered softly, a small smile playing on her lips.

"Wouldn't want that," I replied, trying to sound lighter than I felt.

She put her hand in mine and gave a little tug. I followed her down the stairs and out front where my mother was waiting in the back of Gladys' car. I slipped in back with her while Sookie went up front. I held mama all the way to the church. I held her through the sermons and prayers. I held her while she cried and sniffled as people told old 'Nam stories, fishing tales, memories. I didn't let go when it was time to make our way to the cemetery. The only time I released was when she went to the casket to say goodbye.

When it was my turn, I put her in Sookie's care and said the few small things I could think to say to him…_love you_…_thank you_…_I'll miss you_…

We were the last car to leave the cemetery. When we got home there was a furious buzz amongst our family and friends. All the televisions were on and people were gathered around them.

…_again, we have limited information here. _

_All we know is that two planes crashed into the _

_Twin Towers in New York City, at approximately…_

Sookie tore open her bag and pulled out her phone. I knew she was calling Eric but I was too glued to the television to pay attention. She was gone for a while though, that much I knew. Mama wound up needing another sedative, some of my cousins took her to bed after that. It sounded great by the way, being knocked out. I could have used something myself – pot, a bottle of jack, a hit to the head with a sledgehammer.

After a gut wrenching morning, followed by an hour of television I wish I could forget, I went up to my room. It was too much. Finally the noise was more than I could handle. I closed the door, pulled off my tie and sat on the same corner of the bed as I had earlier in the day. I checked the clock, it wasn't even noon yet. How could so much pain happen before noon?

I tried not to think of my father, I tried not to think about all those lives lost back in New York, I tried, I really did. But I couldn't hold any of it back anymore. I hadn't shed a single tear since I got that first call from mama. I was doing my best to keep everything together, who needed one more weepy person right?

I cried - the floodgates opened and I cried. I couldn't stop them from falling. I think I may have stopped breathing a few times too. I didn't know if I could stop. Why wasn't I stopping? Then I got scared and that made me cry. I was having a panic attack right? I heard Terry explain them enough to know that I was. It was terrifying and sad all at the same time. What could I do?

Then warmth, arms, and soothing sounds.

Someone had wrapped me in their arms. Someone was rocking me. Some sweet smelling woman was making calming little shushing sounds. Her hands ran over my back, through my hair, soothing me. Sookie.

Slowly my breathing got back to normal. My heart calmed itself, the tears dried up. I took a deep breath and composed myself.

Her hands came to either side of my face and pulled me away from her body. She held my head taking a good look at me.

"I was wondering when you would break Sam," and kissed my forehead.

Every emotion I had every felt for her came bubbling to the surface. She was beautiful and kind and knew exactly what I needed and when, she was here for me right? That meant something didn't it? She held me as I cried! I couldn't hold back anymore. I leaned in and kissed her. I poured my everything into that kiss and she let me. She let me kiss her, she didn't pull away, and she didn't flinch.

When I pulled away I looked her in eyes. I wanted to see them shining for me, I wanted to see her blush and say _hey what the hell took ya so long!_ It didn't happen.

"Sam…"

"Sookie I should have done that such a long time ago!"

"Sam…"

"I don't know how to say this but –"

"Sam,"

"Sookie I…"

"That was the grief Sam, I can't even imagine what you're going through. First your father now this and…"

"This isn't grief Sookie, it's me. Sookie I –"

"SAM!" That got my attention. "Sam, I got through to Eric somehow and we talked and…"

"Sookie, I don't care about Eric. You and I, we–"

"Eric asked me to move in with him and I said yes."

**...**

**A/N**

***peeks out from behind her computer screen* **

**Please don't hate me too much ok? You knew it was coming right? **

**So, the 25****th**** reviewer will get their recommendation posted in my next chapter don't forget!**

**It has come to my attention that not everyone's rev button is green. So um… please grace me with your revs anyway ok? It's a FF writer's lifeblood after all. **


	6. Ch 5, August 2003

**Oh man, I really hope you don't hate me for keeping you waiting. But there was a ton to catch up on at work after a week away on vacay. To make it up to you though, there just might be some lemony goodness down there someplace…**

**Mucho thanks to Zeewriter and Pixiegiggles who helped whip this bad boy into shape!**

**FYI, "god morgan" means good morning in Swedish**

**I don't own them - I just wish I had Eric alone in a closet for an hour. **

))((

**Sookie POV**

**August 14, 2003**

It was early and still dark. I had woken up from a dream but had forgotten it the second my eyes opened. Annoying, really; it may have been a continuation of a particularly hot dream I'd been having lately involving Eric, a bucket of ice, and not much else. I looked to my right to see Eric happily sleeping on his stomach. He was naked - his perfectly sculpted back, narrow waist and insanely perfect ass (jealousy-inducing, really), were a welcome sight at 5:56am. Eric slept like the dead; nothing short of a fire could wake the man up, so I wasn't too worried about making noise as I left for the kitchen.

I had been living with Eric for almost exactly two years. I had moved out of Amelia's apartment immediately after that fateful, sad day. I wanted to be close to the man I loved, I wanted his heat and his company. Eric lived in a huge loft off of Broadway near Spring Street. It was all birch wood, white and gray stone – very modern, very Architectural Digest Magazine. In fact, he had found his interior designer from the magazine's pages. He loved it, I … tolerated it. I didn't have much to bring with me except for Gran's quilt and few recent flea market finds, but they were vetoed and stored in a stainless steel chest in the back of the front hall closet.

Eric didn't know how to use the coffee machine, dishwasher, or even the washing machine and dryer. This shocked me, but what shocked me even more was Mrs. Bjurstrom. Mrs. Bjurstrom was Eric's maid, cook, and all around surrogate mom. I can remember the first time I even attempted to do laundry, she almost fainted. I broke a glass and asked her where the broom was so I could clean it up once, only once. I think I broke her heart a little that day. I'd gotten used to her after two years, though. To be perfectly honest, I had damn near forgotten how to iron, fold napkins, or set a table.

The only thing I was "allowed" to do for myself or Eric was cook. She was all for me cooking for my man – she was wonderfully old fashioned that way. However, God forbid I should try to clean up afterward. She wouldn't show up until 8am though, so I still had a few hours. I was tempted to be a rebel and wash my coffee cup, but I instinctively knew that she would figure it out somehow.

It was early, true, but it was never too early for cheese eggs. I started the coffee going and pulled out the eggs. A steaming plate of eggs and toast, a cup of coffee, and a brain full of early morning news and I felt right as rain. Eric didn't usually get up until after nine and I wasn't due at the store until ten. It was almost eight though, so I dropped my dishes in the sink and poured another cup just as I heard Mrs. Bjurstrom unlocking the front door.

A little shuffling, a door closing and opening, and a few minutes later, there she was in her crisp white dress, apron and shoes - her ever perfect bun intact, a smile on her face.

"God morgan, Sookie."

"God morgan, Mrs. Bjurstrom," it had taken months before she would call me by my first name, but I insisted.

"Someone was up early I see?"

"Mhmm, woke up before dawn for some reason, thought I'd have some eggs."

"When I was pregnant I always woke up early starving," she said lifting a brow my way.

Lately, she had been dropping some not-so-subtle hints about marriage and children. I won't lie, I had thought about those things too, but Eric wasn't ready and I knew that. Mrs. Bjurstrom, however, was more than ready to add nanny to her list of jobs.

I smiled at her sympathetically and went to the bathroom to jump in a shower. Now the shower, I loved. It was just this big tiled room, but it was a big tiled room with something like 50 shower head nozzles. Oh the things those nozzles could do! I turned on the myriad of shower heads, adjusted the water temperature, and made my way into the middle of the sprays. Only sex was better - speaking of which ….

I stepped to my right and angled myself toward the wall. My favorite nozzle, one of my best friends actually, hit me just right. I think the nozzle was meant for the lower back, but being short had its advantages sometimes. A rush of warm water hit me, making me moan. Just a little spread of the legs, an angling up of my hips and good lord that was the sweet spot. Something about the heat, the pressure, the constant wet rush, got me off in no time and over and over again - it was almost as good as Eric.

I threw my head back as my body responded. My stomach clenched, my breaths were shallow, and when my body began to shake from its orgasm I let out delicious moan. No sooner had I come down from my high when a certain voice snapped me out of my fog.

"I'm having that jet removed. I shouldn't be jealous of a shower head."

"How long have you been standing there?"

"Long enough," he said, his hand moving to his already proud cock. He pulled on his shaft as he stalked toward me.

There was nothing I could say. His hair was a mess from having just woken up, he was hard and jerking himself off, all the while looking at me, staring at me like I was the answer to every fantasy. When he got close enough, he let go of himself, kneeled on the floor, and placed my leg over his shoulder.

"It's my turn now."

I don't know how I kept standing. I came so hard I lost my breath. Everything got fuzzy. It wasn't until he had lifted me and then lowered me onto his rock hard length that things became clear.

))((

Eric hadn't wanted me to, insisting that he could take care of me, but I so wasn't that girl. So even though we were living with each other, I still worked. I found a job at this funky little boutique in the neighborhood almost by accident. I kept running into this woman at the coffee shop in the mornings. She always wore the most stellar outfits.

One day we struck up a conversation that started not surprisingly with me ogling her shoes. You would have too! They were navy blue and covered in matching sequins. There was a sequined bow right about the peep toe and they had to be at least four inch heels. They were killer. Just so happened that they were from Japan, some name I couldn't pronounce and like a mouse to cheese, I followed her to her store. That's all it took. I started the next day. Work was fun, after all, who wouldn't enjoy playing dress-up all day?

Eric was happy I was happy, although most of my salary went right back into the store. I have a weakness for shoes, always have, always will. It was just past four in the afternoon when the lights went out. Actually everything went out – the music, the clock, the register, everything. We thought it may have been our building. It was old and falling apart and we'd had problems with the electricity before.

Of course, one step out of the store and we knew it wasn't just us. There wasn't a light to be seen anywhere. Traffic lights, store fronts, nothing was on. That's when the fear started trickling down my spine. I hadn't been in New York on 9/11, but something felt off. Other people around me started pulling out their cells and furiously dialing.

I was only just nervous at first, but when I heard the ambulance siren followed by a fire truck and a police car? I started freaking out. Tara pulled me back inside the store, locked the door, and pulled me into the storage room. Neither of us knew what the hell was going on, but it seemed safest to get away from the windows. No sooner were we huddled amongst shoe boxes when the store phone rang and damn near scared me to death!

"Sookie!"

"Eric?"

I couldn't help it and let the tears fall. I was terrified.

"It's okay, I'm coming."

"What's going on?"

"I don't know yet, but don't open the door for anyone unless it's me okay?"

"Okay," I said, trying to get my wits back.

"Is Tara there with you?"

"Yes."

"Okay girls, I'm coming."

Lord help me I've never thought of myself as a damsel in distress who needed rescuing, but just then, I really was. Twenty two long minutes later and we heard loud banging on the door. I crawled out carefully and peered around the counter. There was Eric, dripping with sweat but smiling. I was at the door in flash and in his wet salty arms a moment later. I was panting and crying and a total mess by then.

"Shhh, its okay, its okay. It's not an attack - you're fine."

He held me and rocked me until I had stopped blubbering.

"Everything's okay? What the hell happened then?"

"Power outage across the entire Northeast and Canada."

"That's it!" Tara yelled from behind me. "Shit, that's a relief."

I couldn't have said it better myself. Tara and I closed up while Eric waited for us. No one knew when the power would be back on. Eric and I took our time walking back to the apartment. People were helping others, calming nerves and sweating the day through. It was miserably hot. Every fire hydrant was open and people were handing out free ice cream everywhere we looked. Better to have it eaten then a sticky puddle in the freezer.

We took our time walking back and were standing in front of our building a half hour later. We had to use the stairs of course, but seeing as how sweaty and gross we already were, it hardly mattered anymore. Eric and I had been hand in hand the entire time, only just letting go so I could find the keys and open the door. I had one foot over the threshold when he grabbed my arm to stop me.

"You okay?"

"No, not really."

He looked okay, dripping with sweat and a little worst for wear, but okay. Before I could say anything though, he started talking.

"Sookie, I thought we were being attacked again. I was terrified, but not for myself. Last time this happened you weren't here. I'll be forever grateful that you were in Texas, that you didn't have to see what I saw, that you were safe and away from here. It somehow made it bearable. This time, though, you were here, just blocks away—and it wasn't close enough. What if I had lost you, Sookie?" He paused, dropping his head. I stayed silent. He looked into my eyes, a look of determination that pierced through me. "I never thought I'd do this."

Do _what,_ I thought. But when he dropped to one knee, I knew.

"Marry me."

Not a question or a request, a statement. He knew I loved him, he knew I'd say yes. I dropped to my knees too, pulled his head to mine and kissed him. We must have looked very odd there. The two of us kneeling in the hallway, kissing. I never said the word yes, but I didn't have to. We stood up and walked to the bedroom, opening every window on our way there.

The curtains and blinds were drawn, it was still somewhat cool. As Eric opened the windows, I slipped off my clothes, letting them stay a soggy pile on the floor. I didn't care how sweaty or smelly we were. I needed him inside me. I needed it so badly, I would have begged.

He took me in and started throwing his own clothes off. We met in the middle by the bed. I lay down, and he lay beside me. He took my hand and dragged it down my body until it rested between my legs. Manipulating my pointer finger with his own, he pushed past my lips and started rubbing that spot that most needed rubbing.

"Don't stop," he said as he removed his hand.

I kept touching myself, closing my eyes and taking in the feeling when I felt his tongue lick the crease under my left breast. I arched my back at the unexpected sensation. A moment later, his hot mouth was on my nipple, sucking. His hands wiggled their way past and around my hips until they rested on my ass and grabbed, not letting go.

"Don't stop!"

"Not until you come for me."

Ung! It was times like those that I actually contemplated thanking God _**and**_ Lucifer for Eric Northman. He didn't stop his sucking or his grabbing until I had come, shaking and whimpering out his name. I was spread eagle on the bed, when I felt his warm hand over my sex.

"You get so wet for me, Sookie." He dipped his finger into me and groaned loudly. I watched, mouth open, as he put his finger to his mouth and sucked it dry. I was panting and so desperately wanted him to fuck me senseless by then. Instead, he dipped the same finger in me and pulled it back out.

"Eric … I need you inside me badly."

"But you taste so good," he paused. "Don't believe me?" He traced my lips with his moist finger; a finger that only seconds ago was buried inside of me.

"Lick," he demanded.

I couldn't resist it when he got forceful and dark on me. I stuck out my tongue and licked my lips, not at all caring what I tasted like. What I cared about was his reaction. He bared his teeth, he growled, and not quietly. He growled like an animal. Before I could even finish my top lip, he slammed into me. I bit down on my lip, actually tasting blood. When he bent over my body and licked it up between a particularly long thrust, I thought I might faint. I had never felt so consumed and in lust before.

He pulled my legs up and onto his shoulders. At that angle, Eric was able to glide in and out of me smoothly, and more deeply. I could feel him in my stomach, I could feel him everywhere. With every forward slam I moaned, every time he pulled away I took a breath.

"Touch yourself, I want to feel you clench around me."

Dark and forceful Eric, a lethal combination. I touched my aching nub and rubbed, whimpering. It was swollen and still recovering from its first orgasm. I was hovering in the place between pain and pleasure. Eric was relentless with his hips; I, in turn, was relentless with my fingers. I could feel the stings inside my body tightening. He could feel it too and growled out _yes, yes, yes_.

When I came, I actually saw stars. Things went black, then a burst of light shot in my vision. It was terrifying and spectacular at the same time. Eric wasn't finished though. He pulled out, said "over" and when I was on my knees, he pushed his way back in. This was dangerous territory. He knew how to hit my G spot from this angle, and once had me so lost in an orgasm-induced coma that left me unable to move or speak for a half hour, he lifted me into the shower and helped me wash.

It seemed my G spot was his goal. He fucked me until I screamed his name. His energy was boundless, and while I was screaming his name for the second time, he slammed into my body and froze as he went over the edge and filled me with his hot release.

))((

He was gone before I woke up the next morning. Happily, the electricity was on though. The fact that he was up and out of the apartment spoke volumes as to how tired I had been after our private engagement party. I slipped on a robe and made my way to the kitchen. A vase bursting at the seams with yellow roses was waiting for me, a small envelope resting against it. I tore it open.

_Dearest Fiance,_

_Be ready by 8pm. _

I had no idea what to be ready for, though. No sooner had I begun to ask myself _what for,_ when Mrs. Bjurstrom came in followed by Pam, followed by a woman carting a very large garment bag on a rolling rack.

"Pam, what's going on?"

"I'd tell you, but then I'd get fired. Needless to say it would be in your best interest if you just went with it, okay Scarlet?"

"Umm …."

"Grrrreat. First things first. Gretchen here is going to make sure the dress fits; I can only assume you have shoes for a black dress? Of course you do. Once she's done, we scrub and moisturize you, then we'll tackle hair and make-up and hopefully by eight you'll be ready."

The dress was stunning. Nothing I would have picked out, but I was sure it was couture, cost a fortune, and it happened to look amazing on too. I had black satin shoes on my feet, my hair was up in a twist, blood red lips and enough eyeliner and mascara to put Tammy Fay Baker to shame. I was even ready with two minutes to spare.

The bell rang, and I made my way downstairs and into an awaiting limo. We drove uptown until we got to Central Park. A few more blocks, a right turn, and the driver stopped in front of Tavern on The Green. My door opened, and I was helped out on to the red carpet. Eric had obviously done something very Eric. I still had no idea what it was, but I knew it was going to be extravagant – he'd have it no other way.

I was escorted through the empty restaurant, which he must have rented out, and gasped when I saw the garden. It was lit up in its usual millions of twinkling lights, but tonight, vases upon vases of yellow roses covered every possible surface. The ground, all the tables, they were stuck in the bushes, and even in the hands of Eric. He was in the midst of the spectacle, all decked out in a tuxedo and smiling.

I was pretty much frozen where I stood until he beckoned me to go to him with his finger. I made my way over, taking in the aroma of that many roses. When I was only inches from him, he leaned down to kiss me gently.

"You look perfect."

"So do you. Eric, how did you do all this? Only yesterday the entire north east was …."

"Shhh. No one can say no to me, you should know that by now."

"Yes but–" I couldn't continue, I was pulled into another kiss.

"Sookie, I couldn't do this properly yesterday. I wanted to remedy that."

In an all too familiar move, he dropped to his knee, held my hand and said "Sookie, I love you. I never thought I'd marry, never thought I'd find someone who could keep my attention long enough. But like some magical fairy, you've spellbound me. I love you, always will. Marry me, Sookie Stackhouse."

What was there to say but, "Yes."

He reached into his pocket and pulled out a black velvet box. When he opened it, I gasped. I had never in my life seen a ring like it. It was covered in diamonds, it was massive, and it was so very Eric Northman. He slipped it on my finger, and despite the fact that I thought it was too much, once on, it felt perfect. I looked at my hand; Sookie Stackhouse, fiancé. Sookie Stackhouse dressed in diamonds and couture. Sookie Stackhouse, soon to be Sookie Northman.

))((

**A/N**

**I think I'm forgiven, yes? Please tell me kittens. Outfit on Polyvore ****here**** and also on my profile. **

www (dot) polyvore (dot) com (backslash) til_now_chpt_august_14th (backslash) set ? id = 22365366

**As always the 25****th**** review will get their suggestion posted here. The first 25****th**** review was none other than Zeewriter. She would like to suggest her two stories, both of which she promises to have updated before the end of the world in 2012. **

**Two Hearts Beat as One:** After being left at the altar by Edward, Bella begins a new life, but is always left wondering what could have been. Will true love prevail years later? AH, Very OOC, M for language and future lemons. Bella & Edward with some Bella & Zafrina femslash.

**Due To a Stalled Train Ahead:** Is it possible that true love can be found on the trains of New York City? Law School student, Bella meets Edward on the D train. This can only go one way. AH, rated M for lemons and language. First Fan Fic.


	7. Ch 6, May 2004

**Ummm, ok. So I am fail in every sense of the word! This is late because of me, well of course it is, it's my story. But this time it was stupid… I forgot to send the email with the attachment to my Beta. Then this weekend when I realized that, I also realized I had left the thumb drive in my desk drawer. UGH! So sorry people!**

**This is an all Sam chapter. I seem to have made some serious Sam converts and I love that this is a "guilty pleasure" for some of you. Can't tell you how much I like that.**

**I don't own any of it, but I kinda love my Arlene too Pixiegiggles *wink* **

**PS – thank you to Pixie who whipped my sorry excuse for comma's into shape, and to Zeewriter who let me know that this chapter wasn't a complete disaster. **

**May 3, 2004**

"Remind me again why I agreed to this?"

"Because you don't have a choice."

"Right. How silly of me."

Sookie and I were at the Men's Warehouse in Chelsea, I was getting fitted for a tuxedo. A tuxedo that I didn't want, would never wear again, but was being forced to endure for Sookie's wedding. Wedding … shit. Just thinking about it made me all antsy. She was actually going through with it. She and Eric were getting married in front of 400, that's right 400 of their closest friends and family. Now, I use the word _their_ and _closest_ loosely. I happened to know for a fact that Sookie knew exactly 42 people, all of whom were invited. The other 358 were all Eric's people, and other than Sookie, Pam, and that maid of his, I didn't think he had any close friends. Followers sure, but friends? Don't think so.

The whole thing was Eric, Eric, Eric. Don't get me wrong, it was Sookie's day too, but something told me that left to her own decisions, the event would have been 100 people, a really nice garden someplace, and cupcakes. Instead, it was 400 people, the Puck building, being catered by some hotshot chef, and her dress was some specially made couture number that I can only imagine cost as much as most people's entire weddings.

Sookie just went with it because it was what Eric wanted. And whatever Eric wanted, Eric got. At first it was funny, but now it was getting sad. I saw Sookie slowly turning into Eric's version of Sookie. Gone were her funny yellow shoes and cherry pajamas. Her accent was fading slowly but surly, and he hair had gone from Southern Belle Blonde to some darker shade with all these highlights in it like all the women in New York had.

I couldn't do a damn thing about it, either. All I could do was be Sam, the friend, and Sam the friend was currently being measured for a damn tuxedo. After my fitting, we were meeting up with Amelia and Pam for Sookie's final dress fitting. I don't know how I always get wrangled into these things. Sure I do – I can't say no to her. Never could, never will.

We were finished with the fitting early, and our appointment at the couturier (I had to be instructed on how to say that damn word too!) wasn't for a few hours, so I treated Sookie to some lunch. She had to fit into her dress later, so she ate like a damn mouse, nibbling on lettuce and ice tea … without sugar!

If I wasn't sure that Sookie was 100% happy, I would have spilled my guts out on the table right then and there. I would have told her to leave Eric, choose me, we'd be happy. Of course, she was beaming. All she could talk about was the wedding, how happy they were, their two month-long honeymoon around the world, and on and on and on. Not that I thought that she cared about a trip around the world exactly, but I'd never be able to give her that. She deserved it though. She deserved being shuttled around the world in luxury - seeing the most beautiful places, being spoiled. I couldn't do that for her, well, not the way Eric could.

"So Sook, when you gonna start having kids?"

Silence. Nibble, nibble on a cucumber slice - sip, sip of tea. She wasn't getting away with that. Not on my watch.

"Sookie …."

"Can we talk about something else, Sam?"

"Okay. How many kids do you want?"

"Four," she answered immediately. Her head snapped up and she looked at me in shock.

I just smiled. Sookie and her brood – I could see them all too. Three boys, one little girl - one perfect little copy of Sookie.

Sookie laughed nervously. "Did I say four? Where did that come from? I meant one."

I looked at her non-convincing expression. "I think you meant four, but you've been trained to say one."

"What does that mean?" She snapped at me.

"That means that Eric either doesn't want kids, or only wants enough to be able to ignore."

"Careful Sam," she warned, a little glimmer of the real Sookie shining through. If I weren't so damn glad to see her in there I might have shut my face.

"Why? Sookie, I know he's a looker, I know he's all glitz and glamour …."

"You know I don't care one lick about that stuff!"

"Then why! Why the hell are you marrying this guy?"

"You've got some nerve, Sam Merlotte. Don't tell me how to live my life!" she whispered angrily, trying not to make a scene.

"He doesn't want kids at all does he Sookie?"

"No. But he's going to and he's doing it for me, because it's what I want."

"That's generous of him Sook, real generous," I said as sarcastically as humanly possible.

"Ya it is. You don't owe anyone anything, and you don't get it. In a relationship you make sacrifices for people. This is one of them. What have you ever sacrificed, huh?"

When I couldn't answer her, she stood up and walked away from me, leaving her lettuce and ice tea in her wake. I watched her leave, and when I was sure she was gone, I said to no one at all: "You. I sacrificed you."

**))((**

**May 15, 2004**

I hadn't seen Sookie since she'd walked out on me. But it was May 15th, 2004 and at 6pm Sookie Stackhouse and Eric Northman were getting married. I couldn't leave things the way they were, though. So the day after our little fight, I sent Sookie a bottle of Mama's BBQ sauce and a note, apologizing. She called me, but I missed the message. She thanked me for the sauce and apologized herself. She blamed it on stress and nerves, it made sense … I guess.

Showered, trimmed and as groomed as I could ever be, I showed up at the Puck building at exactly 5:30pm. What a fucking spectacle. There was security at the door checking invitations and ID's, a coat check, champagne was being passed by waiters in black ties, chocolates covered every surface, and there were more white flowers than I had ever seen in my life. I couldn't even tell you what they all were, but every single flower was white. Between the flowers and the amount of perfumes all the ladies were wearing, it was obnoxious.

At 5:50pm, a bell sounded over the loudspeaker and a gentle voice ushered us into the now open ceremony room. More white flowers, everywhere, absolutely everywhere. But in the ceremony space there were hundreds of white chairs, covered in white pillows, with white fabric billowing from the ceiling and walls and yet more white flowers hanging from the ceiling, climbing down the walls, and of course, thousands and thousands of candles and twinkling lights.

I was seated in the bride's section. Of course, I didn't need to be ushered there; the ladies in their finest Sunday hats and dresses gave it away. They were the only splash of color in the whole place. All the rest of the guests were in black, gray, muted tans and silver. Absolutely everyone looked like they stepped off the pages of some fashion magazine. Thank god for the fuchsias, teals, and yellows of Sookie's corner.

At 6:00pm on the dot, an older gentleman stepped through the doors and made his way to the front of the room, the officient. A moment later, four perfectly dressed, tall, mostly blonde and blue eyed men stepped through the doors and made their way to the front. They were followed by Eric, who by the way, wore a tux without a bow tie, a bright pink flower on his lapel, with his hair slicked back. He looked like a class A douchbag from a Miami Vice rerun. I had to suppress a laugh as the theme song ran through my head.

Then things got quiet as some soft, vaguely classical music started playing. The doors opened again, and this time I recognized the face. Pam walked through the doors, wearing some avante garde overly complicated gray dress that I thought was hideous but probably cost a fucking fortune. She was followed by some woman I don't remember, then came a tall blonde woman, who was definitely beautiful, kinda looked like one of the groomsmen actually, then came Amelia all smiles. She winked at me as she passed, and I smirked back.

The music changed, everyone stood, and all I heard were gasps. Everyone was standing so I couldn't see, but when Jason and Sookie came into view, I knew what they were gasping at - Sookie. She was a different woman. She was tall, ram-rod straight. Her hair was pulled tight off of her face, her lips were bright pink, her dress was long and architectural. She was dripping in pink jewels; a massive bouquet of bright pink flowers were in her hands, another placed at the nape of her neck where a long sleek ponytail was resting. She wasn't my Sookie; she was some sophisticated and modern Sookie – all slick and styled. It was not the Sookie I loved, but even I would be blind if I couldn't see how absolutely stunning she was just then.

I don't remember the vows, I don't remember them talking or saying a damn thing. All I remember was a collective "awww" followed by a lot of clapping and hollering. I snapped out of whatever trance I was in long enough to see Sookie and Eric pull apart after their kiss, turn to all of us and start walking down the aisle away from me. And that was it. That was the moment I realized it was over. She was his now. It was official. It was time to wake up, move on, and let them be - let her be.

That being said, I needed whiskey, and I needed it immediately.

**))((**

We were all ushered into another massive room where all 40 tables were set up, the dance floor was lit up, and a staff of waiters were at attention. I sat down and immediately a guy in a waiter get-up was at my side, getting my drink order.

"Whiskey, and keep them coming okay?"

"Of course sir, straight or …."

"He'll have a ginger ale, make that three in fact, and keep those coming instead," said a voice I knew.

The waiter looked between me and Terry for several confused moments before I gave the guy a break, "fine, ginger-ale. Keep them coming."

"You'll thank me when you haven't made a colossal ass of yourself, you know."

"Maybe … Where's Arlene?"

"I dunno, doing something girly in the bathroom."

A moment later our ginger-ales arrived, followed by Arlene.

"Caught him in time I see! Hi Sam," Arlene said as she leaned over to kiss me.

"In time? You two had this planned?"

"Well, I figured you'd want something strong to get thought the night …"

"…and I figured you'd rather not be the drunk dude at the wedding," finished Arlene.

They were right, of course they were right. I didn't want to be that guy, you know that one really drunk guy at the wedding? I couldn't be the drunk guy at the wedding, but being a drunk guy at home? Now that was a different story. Of course, fate has a funny way of stepping in at just the right moment.

**))((**

"OW! Shit. Arlene. That hurt."

"If you would get your sorry head out of your sorry ass, you would have noticed that a very pretty bridesmaid has been looking at you all night. This was just my subtle way of waking you up!"

"A pretty who?"

"Oh for Christ's sake!"

With that, Arlene stood up and walked across the room where the bridesmaid I had noticed during the ceremony was sitting … alone. Shit, I did have my head in my ass. I have no idea what Arlene said to her, but no more than five minutes later Arlene was back with said bridesmaid in tow, a satisfied look on her face. She was nothing if not subtle, huh?

"Sam, Claudine, Claudine, Sam," I stood up, Mama didn't raise a caveman. "Sam is originally from Texas but moved here who knows how long ago. He owns a bar downtown and a crazy dog who like to run in circles. Claudine is Mrs. Bjurstrom's cousin's daughter from Sweden. She's been here for four months and is a nanny for a set of seven year old twin girls on Park Avenue. She'll be finishing her masters in education at NYU this fall. She was also a model back home, if you hadn't guessed that already. Okay, my job here is done. You two kids play nice."

With that, Arlene was off and I was standing in front of a seriously beautiful Swedish girl who was smiling from ear to ear trying very hard not to laugh. Her smile got me smiling and then I was trying not to laugh as well and when we couldn't hold it in anymore, we started laughing like hyenas at the whole thing. It was … refreshing. I hadn't laughed in a while. It felt good.

"She's a real character," said Claudine after we had calmed down.

"She's a firecracker, that's for sure."

"Is she your sister?"

"Arlene? Nah, she's my best friend's wife. That's him over there trying not to look like an idiot on the dance floor."

"Ahhh."

Silence. Shit it was awkward. Think Sam, think. What to do? What to say?

"Will you dance with me?" asked Claudine, holding her hand out for me.

"Shit, Claudine. That was supposed to be my line."

"Okay," then she walked away. My jaw hit the ground. What the hell just happened? She went back to her table and sat down. I had to shake my head a few times before I realized that she was staring at me and tilting her head. Huh? I felt like Bill, running around in circles, confused. When she finally looked at me, laughed and beckoned me over with her pointer finger, I finally got it. She was giving me the chance to be the guy I should have been from the get-go.

I straightened my bowtie, took a breath and walked over.

"Hello, my name is Sam. May I have this dance?"

"Hi Sam, my name is Claudine. I'd be honored."

I led her to the dance floor. We danced for a solid hour and I only looked at Sookie twice.

**))((**

**A/N**

**Ok, so maybe things are looking up right? As always, 25****th**** review gets their reading suggestions posted her in the next chapter. A next chapter, by the way, that will be posted in a timely manner… I PROMISE!**

**Link to Sookie's dress and Jewels on Polyvore in my profile too.**

**http(colon)****/www(dot)polyvore(dot)com(backslash)till_now_chapter_sookie_eric(backslash)set(question mark)id(equal**** sign)22978493**

**So please leave a review – it really is the FF writers' lifeblood. **


	8. Ch 7, January 2007

**So ya… it's been a long time, I know. But, I actually have some really good reasons. My food blog has gotten some great attention lately (from a few celeb chefs in fact!) and I was in an international food blogging competition (which is still running, but I didn't win). That competition led to some new online writing offers. One of those offers made me the food editor of a new lifestyle site that provides original content to national websites, newsletters, magazines, and newspapers. I'm pretty excited about all that. So, my story got pushed to the back burner temporarily I'm afraid. But I'm back! I couldn't quit this, I love it too much. And besides, you people are too nuts and horny to be left hanging ;-)**

**A quick re-cap. We left Sam having just met Claudine at the end of Sookie and Eric's wedding. That was three years ago in 2006. **

**Also, please be kind, all mistakes are my own… it's a un-beta'd chappie. **

**I don't own a stitch of it, but if I did I'd be in Provence!**

**))((**

**January 2007**

"Lord you're amazing; I'm going to be the envy of every single man in that room tonight."

Claudine was artfully disheveling her hair. She did this thing where she would make it all perfect – gelled, blown, brushed, then she'd thrash her hands through it like she was having a fit. I don't know how, but it always looked like she was just fucked. It was sexy as all get-out. She glossed her lips in something shimmery and put on some mascara. She gave me a small, tight smile.

Things had been difficult with us lately. After Sookie and Eric's wedding we started dating. About ten months later, an apartment opened up in Pam's building and we moved in together. I was happy, I really was. The bar was doing well, I had made my peace with the whole Sookie thing, and I was dating a stunning woman who was smart, caring, and the breathe of fresh air that I so desperately needed in my life.

Two years later, things were different. Claudine and I had been together for a while and the whole marriage thing kept popping up. I avoided the discussions as much as I could. Truth was though, I was running out of excuses. There was no logical reason for me not to marry her. We were good together. I loved Claudine didn't I? We had a great sex life. She wanted kids. My family thought she was great too. But something wouldn't let me pop the question. I had no idea what that something was until later that very night.

It was New Years Eve. We were going to a big bash at one of Eric's clubs. I was in a black on black tux, Claudine was in this gold dress that was shapeless, went down to her ankles and had a high neck, but when she turned around… nothing. It was an engineering miracle really. The dress was completely naked in back from her shoulders to very top of her ass. It made me drool and all I wanted to do was reach around and grab her tits every time I saw her turn around.

But her icy shoulder routine was stopping me from starting anything. I didn't want to guilt her into sex, or play dirty; I wanted her to want me again. We hadn't really been intimate for months since the stress between us began. I was being stupid about the whole thing and I knew it. Like I said there was nothing stopping me from asking her to marry me. Not one single thing right?

I was standing by the bathroom door watching Claudine get herself ready when I just decided it was time. One second I wasn't ready, the next I was. I didn't have a ring but New Years Eve sounded like a perfect time to propose even without bling. I'd take her to the diamond district that very weekend and we'd pick something out – anything she wanted. I loved her, I knew I did. I didn't want her hurting anymore either, I couldn't live with that.

A car came by for us at 9pm. I opened the door and settled in beside her. I had made up my mind; I was going to do it – the question would be popped at midnight. I had magically convinced myself it was a good sign that I wasn't nervous. That meant that it was the right decision, that I was sure of it all. My lack of nerves absolutely didn't mean that there was nothing behind the gesture - it meant confidence… I was such an idiot.

I took her hand in the car and kissed it gently. "You look like an angel tonight and I love you very much."

"Thank you," she answered quietly. I could see a small smile creep onto her lips. Yes. Tonight was the night. I'd make her happy. I mean, I'd make us happy.

When we got to the club, the party was already rocking. Champagne flowed, food was passed, and everyone looked amazing - it was New York at its flashy best. It was about ten or so when someone spoke into my ear.

"You're looking very GQ tonight Sam Merlotte."

I laughed and turned to face the only person who ever called me by my full name - Sookie. I was going to say something clever like: _us Texas boys clean up good_, or something just as stupid but I couldn't. She was all glammed up - slick hair, some artful feathery hat thing on her head, diamonds in her ears, ruby red lips. She was in dark satin with long satin gloves. She hadn't looked so breathtaking since her wedding and I couldn't get a single word out. I was dumbstruck.

"You alright? Did you swallow wrong or something?"

I willed myself to snap out of it.

"No, no, just wondering what kind of bird had to die for that thing on your head."

She tsk-ed me dramatically, shaking her head.

"I'm disappointed in Claudine; she finally got you out of cowboy boots but failed to illuminate you to the world of Couture. I'll have to have a little talk with her about that."

Illuminate? Couture? And just like that, my Sookie bubble was burst for the millionth time. The Sookie I loved was dead and gone no thanks to diction lessons, two martini lunches, Gallery openings, and fashion shows. The Sookie I loved didn't know what Couture was, and certainly would never use the word "illuminate" for anything other than light bulbs. Right then and there I realized there was no reason for me to wait a second longer - I needed to find Claudine and quickly. I made my excuses to Sookie and desperately searched for my future.

I found her speaking to Eric on the balcony level. He was wearing a tuxedo shirt with no tie, his jacket open, one button too many unbuttoned. He looked like a class A douche bag Vegas lounge singer to me, but what the hell did I know?

"Eric, I need Claudine." That caught both of their attention. Claudine looked at me surprised.

"Are you ok?" she asked, sincerely concerned.

"No."

"No?"

"I mean yes…"

"Well which one is it man?" asked the ever helpful Eric.

"Eric, will you excuse us?"

He nodded dumbly as I took Claudine's hand and pulled her behind me. I couldn't think with all the people around me, the music thumping, and Eric staring at me. Sookie would be looking as well and something about that felt wrong too. I didn't stop until we hit the freezing cold air. I took a deep breath and turned around to see a very flustered Claudine. She looked half concerned and half furious.

"I didn't plan this very well. I'll do it all over again tomorrow if you want me too ok?"

"Sam what the hell is wrong with you? It's freezing out here and you..."

I cut her off with a kiss before she could continue. It was strong and intense; I poured whatever I had into that kiss.

"Wow," she said when I pulled away.

"I don't have anything to give you right now, but I'll fix that soon ok? Right now I just want to hear you say yes."

"Yes to what?"

I got to one knee and took her hand.

"I'm a moron for not doing this sooner. I love you. You're beautiful and charming and smart and I want to give you everything. Marry me?"

Her jaw dropped. She began to cry. I could see her shivering. Then she smiled and nodded enthusiastically.

"Yes?"

"Yes, yes, yes, of course yes I'll marry you!"

I got up off my knees, grabbed her and twirled her around like some silly music video, I couldn't help it though. I was happy for her – I mean us. I was happy for us.

"Stay right there!"

I ran into the club, found our coats and met her right where I left her.

"We're not staying?"

"There's something I've wanted to do all night and I can't do in there."

"Yes? What's that?"

"Take off that dress and touch you."

**))((**

The cab ride was too damn long. All I could think about was that she was naked under that dress. Well except for a tiny piece of fabric that was resting between her butt cheeks and covering her smooth waxed sex. She liked it that way, to be honest I always preferred something a little more, I dunno, natural? But far be it from me to complain.

I threw money at the cabbie and we raced to the third floor. I opened the door just as she jumped into my arms and started sucking on my ear lobe. That shit drove me crazy. Thank god we lived in a loft, not enough walls or doorways for me to smack her into. I made our way through the apartment to the bedroom and lowered her onto the bed. I slipped off my shoes. Coat was next, and then jacket, tie, and I unbuttoned my shirt.

She lay there, looking at me undressing, a sly smile playing on her lips. She slipped off her shoes and unbuttoned her coat. She pulled the thick wool away from her and onto the floor. She reached down to pull up her dress but I stopped her hand. I wanted the pleasure of undressing her. I got to my knees, reached under her dress, and let my hands drag up her long slim legs.

She shuddered when I reached her upper thighs. I could feel heat coming from between her legs. I pushed her thighs apart as much as her dress would allow. Grazing her slit with my pointer fingers as I slid my hand further up made her moan quietly. When I hooked my finger around the waistband of her barely-there thong and pulled it down slowly, I made sure to let my knuckles graze her flesh again, she raised her hips.

I threw the panties across the room and asked her to stand up and turn around. I slipped my hands through the opening in the back of her dress, and cupped her perfectly hand-sized, pert breasts in my hands. She threw her head back against mine, and ground her ass into my groin. I knew she could feel how hard I was getting. There was nothing between me and her naked body except for some gold fabric; I took care of that too. I pushed my hands away from her breasts and the dress began slipping from her arms - down her shoulders, over her elbows, off her wrists, until the entire thing just pooled at her feet.

I took a step back and admired her long, slim, lithe frame. Her tousled blonde hair was resting on her bare back. Her waist and slight hips gave way to her sweet little ass and her long slim legs. She was gorgeous, there was no doubt about it. She was going to be my wife and I only hoped that kids would broaden her hips, accentuate her waist, give some weight to her breasts, thicken her thighs. Maybe she'd finally attack an apple pie instead of nibble on it… maybe one day she'd fill out a bikini the way that Soo…

"Coming?"

She was on the bed, on her hands and knees, her ass in the air. She was moving toward the middle of the bed. She turned around, collapsed on her back, opened her legs, and licked her middle finger. Slowly, she let it disappear deep inside her. She moaned my name and arched her tits to the ceiling. I slipped out of my pants, socks, and boxers quicker than I thought possible.

Her finger was still buried inside her when I let my tongue pass over her clit. Her breathe hitched and her finger stopped.

"No, keep going" I told her.

She kept playing with herself as I licked, nibbled, and kissed her sweet spot. When she began rolling her hips at me I knew she was close. I doubled my efforts; I wanted her dripping wet and panting before I slipped inside. When she cursed in Swedish I knew she was about come for me. I didn't stop until she raised her hips, froze, and sucked in a breath.

The second her hips touched the bed and her breath came back in a halting sigh, I pushed myself into her. Jesus she was so wet and warm. When she began panting, I began rocking in and out of her. I put my hands around her rib cage, pulled her up, and pressed her body to mine. We rocked together.

"I love you Sam," she said.

"I love you too," but her name didn't come out of my mouth because in my mind, I saw suddenly saw someone else. Sookie was wearing the same bikini she had on all those years ago at Terry's July 4th BBQ. It was red, with little bows on it. Sookie was all softness and curves. Thick, wavy hair caressed Sookie's shoulders; heavy full breasts were peeking from the sides of the bikini top, wicked hips and a full ass wiggled with every step. Sookie's shapely thighs gave way to tanned pretty legs.

I felt a hot breath on the side of my face and warm mouth on my ear. Shit that drove me insane. I pushed her on her back lifted her legs over my shoulders and pressed into her body. All I could feel was consuming warmth around dick and the weight of legs on my shoulders. I could hear her moaning and panting, but all I could see was Sookie soaking up the sun, laughing, winking at me.

When I felt the warmth contract around my length, when I heard her scream out my name, all I could see Sookie walking toward me. Sookie was untying the strings of her bikini top, she blew me a kiss and I knew I was close.

"Come for me Sam," she pleaded beneath me.

I kept my eyes firmly shut while I released into her. I could hear myself repeating "love you, love you, love you," but who was I really talking to?

**))((**

The next morning I woke up alone.

It was New Years day, the yoga studio was closed, likewise the bakery or coffee shop. I knew Claudine wasn't with the kids she looked after, or at school. She was nowhere to be found. I tried her cell but only got the message. At a loss, I went to kitchen, opened the fridge for some orange juice, took a long gulp-worth then shut the door. That's when I noticed it. Under the "T is for Texas" magnet was a folded piece of paper with my name on it – shit, it might as well been addressed "Dear John." I opened it knowing exactly what it was. She was leaving me but I could have never guessed why.

_Sam,_

_We can't do this to each other. _

_You're too good of a man to say it to my face and I'm tired of thinking that more time, a marriage, or even kids could change the fact that you don't love me – _

_at least not the way I love you. _

_I knew last night that while you would no doubt take care of me, love me in your way, it wouldn't be enough. You weren't making love to me last night, Sam, not really. You were making love to her again. I don't know who she is, but she is an incredibly lucky woman to have someone like you loving her so fiercely._

_I hope you find her again Sam. _

_I won't pretend that this doesn't hurt, because it does, more than anything; _

_but I deserve more. Our time together was amazing, I don't regret a single day and I hope you can say the same._

_I'll come by this weekend for my things; I would really appreciate it if you weren't there._

_I need some time, but maybe one day we can meet again as friends. _

_Yes, I think I'd like that._

_Until that day, all my love,_

_Claudine._

What broke my heart was that she knew. She knew the entire we were together that I couldn't give her my everything but she never said a word. I felt like the scum of the earth. She didn't cuss me out or call me a dog or nothing. She was just honest and it tore me up inside. She was going to make some man incredibly happy, to this day I wish it could have been me – but she was right, I belonged to someone else. I didn't regret a second spent Claudine either. And really did hope that we would meet again someday as friends. It would like that too.

I called Terry and asked if I could pay them a visit that coming weekend. I hadn't seen the kids for a while after all I said. I had some presents to give everyone. Terry bought it, Arlene didn't. I knew I'd have a lot of explaining to do.

**))((**

**So ya. Some lemony goodness peppered with some sour grapes huh? I promise to have the next chapter up way sooner than this one. **

**You know what I'm going to ask… please leave a review. Even if it's to welcome me back or chastise me for being a selfish foodie mmmk?**


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